Growing and maturing beyond resentment Part 2
Resentment leaves an endless void that one attempts to fill with things that are usually unhealthy for them. You avoid confronting what is bothering you. There is a way out of this.
Marriage is the perfect place to learn properly how to deal with resentment. You two are supposed to be life partners. Like it or not you vowed to help one another become the best that each of you can be? Or were those just words? However each spouse must be willing to take responsibility for their part!
You cannot change what has happened but you can begin to learn how to “let go” of any resentment. Letting go does not mean that you continue to allow the action(s) to occur again. It means that you make a conscious effort to make some behavior changes. Insanity is; “dong the same thing over and over and expecting different results.”
Many marriages suffer because resentment is what binds the husband and wife together. Life has become a tally board of how many times they have hurt one another or allowed others to hurt them. Instead of becoming transparent and drawing closer to one another. They all too often run to their friends and seek their support rather than seeking to resolve the problem within their marriage.
There is nothing wrong with talking with your friends, relatives or having a support group. There is nothing wrong with having a therapist, counselor, life coach or any other professional service. Be sure that you are honest if you want favorable results. Just make sure that you do not relay the incident in a way that you are supported when or if you are in the wrong. This will not really help you, your family, friends nor your marriage. This does not mean that the experience was not painful or wrong! You instead seek to become empowered by the incident once you commit to resolve the related unresolved anger. Why? Because you want to be free from it. Or do you really? This means that you will have to allow the pain to dissipate that is associated with what has transpired. But it must first be allowed to come to the Light so you can properly deal with it.
You will have to build a bridge of emotional stability across it to not let it hold you captive any longer. It does not mean that you have to forget. It means that you will have to confront yourself and how you have allowed whatever it is to remain unresolved.
Why Marriage God’s Way is Important
The Holy Spirit is the Comforter and Teacher that resides with us as believers to lead and guide us to all Truth! All the Laws given to us by Moses and the prophets pointed us back to the righteousness of God. It is through His Holy Spirit the Lord now writes His laws within our hearts as we walk in obedience to His Word!
Jesus tells us: “If you love Me, keep my commandments. And I will pray the Father, and He shall give you another Comforter, that He may abide with you forever. Even the Spirit of Truth, whom the world cannot receive because it seeth Him not, neither knoweth Him; but ye know Him; for He dwelleth with you, and shall be in you. I will not leave you comfortless; I will come to you!” John 14. This is a loaded powerful Scripture that will have a major impact upon your personal life once you sincerely embrace it and allow the Holy Spirit to embed it deeply within your heart!
God’s way for marriage is for a committed monogamous heterosexual couple consisting of One man + One Woman! As believers we must continue to present the TRUTH of GOD’S WORD for marriage. We are called believers because we believe and embrace GOD’S WORD! There is much spiritual warfare to undermine the validity of Marriage His Way!
Marriage God’s Way is the ultimate relationship between One man & One woman where we can learn to become One!
It is in His Word we are better able to understand why at times we as committed believers will not be understood. For many embracing God’s principles for life and living has become optional. The world is ever moving away from godly principles. Whatever is right in the eyes of man is accepted. As believers we should readily live out the Truth of God’s Word within the confines of our marriage. “Holy Matrimony” once considered as a sacred union designed by God is becoming a fleeting standard.
The vows we make should not be just mere words.
In the Word we can also better understand why the world at large does not readily accept His Word. This is nothing new. Marriage between one man and one woman remains ordained by God.
Marriage is the first institution that God designed. This is also another reason why there is so much spiritual warfare to try and change it. You can opt to do your own thing. But this does not nullify what He has said. You really can’t change His original design as far as GOD is concerned. There is a plethora of spiritual wisdom in His Word to enrich our lives in every way. When a husband and wife are on one accord there is spiritual power in the unity of their marriage.
The world does not believe that God’s design for marriage is the only way. Just look around you. This is why it is so very important that we study and know His Word for ourselves. When we grow in His Grace, Knowledge and Wisdom His Love continues to grow within us. More of the Fruit of His Spirit manifests and multiples within us as well. We can trust God in any and every situation.
Pray for spiritual discernment!
God’s Holy Spirit residing within is readily available to help us as we submit to His Will His Way! “But the Comforter, which is the Holy Ghost, whom the father will send in my name, He shall teach you all things, and bring all things to your remembrance, whatsoever I have said to you. Peace I leave with you, My peace I give unto you; not as the world giveth, give I unto you. Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid…”John 14.