Embracing the Fruit of the Spirit within your marriage “Self- Control” Part 9 No. 3 of 3

January 2, 2020 by Elder/Minister DeBorrah K. Ogans
Filed under Marriage & Relationships

Embracing the Fruit of the Spirit within your marriage “Self-Control”

Part 9 No. 3 of 3

Trust and good communication are crucial values within a great marriage. Transparency and intimacy are built upon trust. It is really important to not rush into making any decisions that will impact the rest of your life. Being focused is important. Take time and first consider the consequences! There is always much to learn about one another. Keep your marriage exciting. Progressively work on building good communication skills. You can maintain the spark that brought you together. Or if you have allowed it to dwindle you can rekindle it.

Here are few final things to keep in mind

Make it a point to have some good healthy quality discussions before you jump heart first into marriage. If you are already married take the time to find out how your spouse feels, thinks and processes their thoughts and emotions. Being focused is important. Please don’t just assume how they are feeling. Feelings need to be validated.

Have some deep heartfelt discussions. You need to really know what one another values.

You are two different individuals who must learn to walk together. Remember your vows you made to one another. Were they just words? Remember the love, emotions and feelings that brought you together. It is possible but it takes commitment and transparency to keep those precious moments. Emotional intimacy is important in marriage.

Each marriage has its own unique dynamics. Here are a few suggestions and questions to ponder and discuss.

What are your likes and dislikes? How do feel about having or not having children? What are your beliefs in regard to discipline? How do you feel about the manner in why or how you both handle discipline? How do you both resolve conflict? Who or what do they believe in? How do they feel about God and prayer? What are your spouse’s moral standards or convictions or do they have any at all… Is faithfulness important? What does it really mean to be faithful? What about the finances? Are there any abuse issues that need to be addressed? Are there any addictions? Is divorce an option? These are a few of the many things you want to discuss and ponder in order to build a better marriage!

When you both share the same values, morals and goals it helps to build a healthier emotional bond. You have the needed components necessary to build a strong foundation for your marriage. This also accelerates your marriage to a higher functioning level. If you have very little in common at least now you know this. As you go forward in order to build a strong marriage you want to continue to be transparent with one another.

If you do not have much in common you really need to have some serious discussion about what you are expecting from one another. What are your goals for your marriage? How do we decide whose perspective is right or better? You need to at least have some idea as to the direction your marriage is headed. You want to make sure that the feelings you have are not just “intoxicating affections.” Why? Because they won’t last. being focused is important. You really want to make sure you are on the same page about true godly love and commitment. So where do we go from here.

The growing trend today is to simply just change partners when you are not happy. Some people are quite shallow in their idea of commitment. Infidelity is a big No! No! It is vaguely possible, but few marriages ever really recover from continued infidelity. Which really is not marriage; but it is really a revolving door. This breeds distrust and insecurity. Many proceed in denial not resolving the present void or distrust. When trust has been broken it must be restored or this will become a destructive relational pattern. As adults you have the right to decide, but you always should consider the long-and short-term consequences. Divorce or continued conflict is inevitable when not fully confronted and addressed.

Let’s begin to get rid of the baggage!

I recommend taking some time to rid yourself of some of the baggage that you have been carrying before jumping into another marriage or relationship. All too often it is just pushed to the side only to rise and cause even greater problems the second or even third time around further down the road. If you are already married work with what you have. Revisit your vows. Take inventory and then set some goals together. Recapture the good tender moments that brought you together. It’s important to make plans together. Your marriage won’t just work itself out.

The grass looks greener on the other side of the fence. The TRUTH is, its greener because they water it consistently, they maintain, feed and take care of it. Your marriage will be what you both make it.

Now is the time to begin to exercise self-control as well as fervently embrace all the rest of the benefits of earnestly seeking the Lord for the “Fruit of the Spirit.” After all you have or did make a Covenant with one another and to God… This makes your marriage a Holy agreement. Or perhaps just words you repeated? Being focused is important. Setting and reaching goals together is important. Therefore, seek quality Holy Help from God whenever necessary. Humble yourself before the Lord. The Fruit of His Spirit is produced within us only by God’s precious Holy Spirit. What is so beautiful about God is; God cannot ever be manipulated. However, He is always omnipresent with us and always knows absolutely where we are coming from. GOD is The SPIRIT of TRUTH! This is why it is so vitally important to establish an ongoing genuine relationship of Trust with Him. You do not even have to speak aloud a word. He hears and knows all that is spoken or unspoken. What an awewonderful powerful God He is for He truly is; “THE MOST HIGH GOD!”

“Praying without ceasing” is a meditative state of mind that keeps us focused upon staying connected to GOD!

Know this, marriage is only for this side of Heaven. We are bestowed with the opportunity to experience the ultimate human oneness in marriage while we inhabit the earth. Your marriage will be whatever you allow it to be… There is no marrying in Heaven. So, if this is your choice for here on earth give it your best. Reach for a life of quality! Always trust God to lead you not only in your marriage but in all areas of your life for in Him rests complete understanding and wisdom. In God you can be whole!

Praying together is important as well! Praying without ceasing” all throughout your day keeps you connected to the Lord. It is an intimate personal wireless communication connection with God. This is a cognizant healthy state of mind clarity when you practice being focused upon God. This is how you become whole. Your desire should always be to please God. “Perfect Love casts our fear.” Trusting God is one of the most important things that you can ever learn to do. For God always has our best interest at heart. He is our endless source of love and wisdom. God will never leave nor forsake us! This can and will keep you from being depressed or fearful. “FATHER GOD ALWAYS KNOWS BEST!”

Happiness is a choice, so you both need to decide to make this a mutual goal. There will be highs and lows. Unhappiness does not have to be the theme of your marriage. So always make love deposits of care, concern, love, respect, romance and thoughtfulness to your marriage. This will help you weather the storms of life. It leaves less room for anxiety and unhappiness to dominant your lives and marriage. Strive and thrive to create a nurturing safe haven. This also helps you to rise above the storms of life. You cannot change one another. But you can create a healthy atmosphere that fosters change. There is always room for improvement in all of us. “We are forever becoming. We never arrive.” Well that is the case until Christ Jesus comes for us. You can help bring out the better qualities in one another. Or you can bring out the worst in one another. Take note of your personal progress. Work on becoming the “Best You.” Your marriage should always be a priority. Working together will have definite amazing results!

Exercising self-control is a choice. If you are weak in this area. Get right! Rather than tearing one another down all the time build one another up! Chastise one another in love instead to encourage self-improvement. Correction is a part of love. Challenge one another. Do withdraw from nagging. Abandon dysfunctional ways of living. Check yourself! Don’t allow carnality to rule your life. Uphold healthy boundaries. Self-control is helpful in all areas our lives. Love attracts. So, make it a goal to keep your love alive! Have some good healthy dialogue and let whatever has hindered your marriage to this point go and move forward as partners. Never take one another for granted.

No, you do not go forward in denial. Forgiving does not mean forgetting. You want to remember, and you also want to get over the pain. It means that you have decided to let whatever it is go and move forward not holding the offense against them. The past becomes a reminder of your decision to let go and move on. Or make it a point before you go down that road to minimize making pain a major component in your life and marriage. You make a point to consciously let go of the old offenses and make way for the new awaiting life. This is a lifestyle change for a better future! This is possible when you don’t allow the not so good large or small things of the past to become the present… Each day now becomes a new day for building a better life and marriage. If your marriage is great Hallelujah Thank God!

“LIVE BEFORE AN AUDIENCE OF ONE!”

Welcome embracing all the “Fruit of the Spirit” in your life every day. Life is a precious gift from God. I assure you that in the long run, you will be much happier. Since God has given us all free choice make it a goal to continuously make better choices even if you already do. The spiritual warfare about us is real and continues to want to hinder us sometimes in the slightest ways. When you daily apply and practice godly principles you and your spouse will also benefit greatly. You both can become stronger together. “Iron sharpeneth iron” Come what may, be encouraged! You can do this; because remember happiness is a choice!

By the way, if you are divorced, in the process of a divorce married or remarried make a sincere attempt to not involve the children in your disputes. If you have; STOP! DON’T TRY AND MAKE ADULTS OUT OF YOUR CHILDREN. They are already suffering because of the disharmony that they see or sense between you. They too also have their own challenges dealing with growing up since we live in a very complicated complex world. Please don’t use them as message carriers. It is selfish to use them for your emotional support. You both are supposed to be their caregivers… After all, your first priority should be for their emotional well-being. Please do not go on a guilt trip about what has been. Stay on the Narrow Path with God. Seek now to make life a pleasant journey. Do remember and embrace the lessons learned from it. And yes, continue to press forward.

In the case of divorce, the truth is you two were not able to resolve your own conflicts. This may be the case of one or both of you. Children are more observant than you think. You have been in an emotional battle, and it has spawned some residual hurt feelings. Their resentment will surface in many ways due to the collateral damage they are experiencing. This may not have been your intention but there is a residual of resentment. Give your children the opportunity to express themselves. But it is important that they are always encouraged to be responsible and respectful. Seek to break the cycle of dysfunction. Allow their reactions to be the catalyst and motivation to want to build an even heathier environment for them. Keep in mind they have their own natural stresses and growing pains to manage through… You want to help prepare them for whenever they decide to marry. They still need to learn how to develop healthy coping skills and so do you as parents. Let this encourage you to model to them the “Fruit of the Spirit” as you all move forward together or separately. Always focus on how to improve your quality of life and building a healthy environment in and around you mentally, physically as well as visually.

Be careful of who you receive counsel from or who you allow to speak into your marriage or your life. Experience is not always the best teacher. But it is always wise to welcome godly wisdom. When someone says something that you do not like or agree with it does not necessarily mean that they are being negative. Loving others is not telling them what they want to hear. If its true ponder and accept it or if not have exit ear and keep progressively moving forward. Be accountable to God for your own behavior. Make sure that you own up to your contribution of whatever problems or issues your marriage is experiencing. Marriage is supposed to be a team effort. Not all spouses naturally embrace teamwork. But it does not necessarily take a team to destroy your marriage. By one spouse’s own willful behavior divorce can result. It does take both of you working together not against one another to make it work.

Diligently daily seek the Lord’s direction. Make it a priority to take time to; “BE STILL and KNOW”
Psalm 46

As a believer it should always be more important to you to please GOD. This does not mean getting caught up in all the local Church activities to the degree you neglect your home life. Know it also pleases God when you keep your vows you have made to Him and your spouse. Ministry starts in your home. In this 21st century some of everything goes on within the many places of worship. So stay focused and also be aware of what is going on about you. Establish a mode of sincerely worshipping God. You must commit to spend time with the Lord in His Word and draw closer to Him. Your own personal Bible Study and studying together is important as well. This is where and how you will gain healthier spiritual strength. Remember we the people are God’s Church.

There really is nothing more important than growing closer to God. He is the quintessential essence of everlasting life. I assure you, all that you will ever need for life, daily living and eternal life you can discover in an ongoing healthy personal intimate relationship with God.

Remember our relationship as Believers with God is eternal. For there is life beyond earth. Be certain today without a doubt where you will spend eternity. GOD IS OMNISCIENT! When you seek HIM above all else there are marvelous unlimited benefits. Know that your body is the Temple of God. You need to feed and nurture your body and soul spiritually and physically. Know when and how to eat and know when to fast. Think and ponder upon this for a moment; God is the Creator of Heaven and earth. He is the Creator of man and woman. No one knows better than He about anything. He can and will direct you in every area of your life. He will never leave nor forsake you. To truly know this you must believe this without doubt.

Marriage God’s way can and does work. God has ordained marriage so do not leave Him out of it. But you both must be willing to mutually embrace His godly principles and actually implement them within your marriage. God wants to be a part of every area of your life. God does not want you to spend your life unhappy, bitter or broken. God does not have to break you to use you. He can meet you right where you are. But He does want you to take seriously the vows that you both made to Him. You can recover from this. But recovery takes hard work!

Every day is a precious “GIFT” from the Lord. What you do with your life is your gift to Him. Strive and thrive to be better helpmeets to one another. So, lets get busy building a life and a marriage that lasts. This way everyone benefits. May your efforts in Holy Matrimony prevail!

“But the Fruit of the Spirit is Love, Joy, Peace, Patience, Kindness, Goodness, Faithfulness, Gentleness and Self Control…” Galatians 5. May they all by God’s marvelous grace manifest, multiply and abound within your lives, homes and your marriage!

May God’s Eternal Everlasting Love begin to flourish and abound between you now and forever!

Tags: #being focused, #praying without ceasing, #wireless communication, baggage, be still and know, collateral damage, commitment, communication, discipline, divorce, essence, faithfulness, Fruit of the Spirit, gentleness, harmony, healthy environment, helpmeet, Holy Matrimony, intimacy, joy, kindness, love, marriage, marriage counseling, patience, peace, Self Control, sex, trust

Getting Your Joy Back! Part 3

February 6, 2019 by Elder/Minister DeBorrah K. Ogans
Filed under Behavioral & Emotional Health, Uncategorized

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Know that You are not alone for God is Omnipresent!

How are you when you are alone? Know that you are never really alone because everywhere you are God is present. God’s omnipresence is wonderful! Spending time alone with God can be refreshing. This is a time to build spiritual intimacy and grow in His Word. A time to pray and release your burdens to Him. But most of all a time to Thank Him for being GOD! This also is a great time to get your JOY back!

If you are lonely you need to connect more with the Lord. God really is everywhere you are. He can fill the void in your life. He has placed in each of us a space only He can fill. You can reach out to the Lord wherever you are. Momentarily lay aside whatever is distracting you. Become cognizant of what is happening around you as you then invite the presence of the Lord all around you. Take this time to pray and seek His direction.

“Praying without ceasing” is a state of mind. You do not even have to utter a word. You simply discipline yourself to shift your focus upon the omniscient God. This is also what keeps you connected to Him as well. God is the Creator and Sustainer of life.

There needs to be a balance in your life

The point here is that there needs to be a balance in your life. For all this to happen you must begin to relate to the Lord differently. GOD is a SPIRIT! As you develop an intimate relationship with the Lord He reveals Himself to You more and more.

All the books in the world cannot totally explain GOD and HIS infinite wisdom and knowledge. The Word of God gives us a factual spiritual account of who He is. God has given us His Holy Spirit who can and will open our spiritual understanding. He will bring His Word to our minds as we study and embrace it within our hearts. We can continuously grow in His grace. KEEP IN MIND GOD KNOWS ABSOLUTELY EVERYTHING! In the Lord you really can discover everything that you will ever need for life, daily living and eternal life.

Worship the Lord in Spirit and in Truth!

There is nothing I enjoy more than a marvelous Spirit filled Worship service. God should always be the main attraction in and during worship. Some come to be entertained, socialize and need an escape? Some because they need a quick fix? Some often simply come out of habit? Some will come because they do not know God and are searching? Some sincerely come because they want to worship and praise the Lord. They know that God really is everywhere that they are.

It is important to always be aware of what is going on around you regardless of where you worship. Too much has entered into worship from the world. Worship is no longer sacred to many. GOD KNOWS why we all do what we do as well as why we worship Him. Think about it for a moment. Is the objective of worship to make everyone feel good? Or, Is it to make them want to give? God is continually revealing Himself to us. As we diligently worship Him we can better understand and realize that life and living really is all about God.

I Thank & Praise God for His Living Word Christ Jesus and His Holy Spirit! Truly God is the Most High God! God deserves the Preeminence! He is due our sincere worship and praise. God will provide whatever it is we need in order to fulfil His purpose within our lives. Have Faith in God we can forever trust him. To please the Lord we must always worship GOD in SPIRIT and in TRUTH!

Life is full of many experiences

Life brings about a plethora of experiences. But through them all the Lord is present. Yes, at some time we all are going to experience a degree of anxiety, conflict, sickness, disappointment, grief or turmoil at some point in our lifetime. A little anxiety is actually healthy because it helps you to put yourself in check. As followers of Christ Jesus God has told us that we are going to have tribulations while in this world, but through Christ Jesus we can always emerge victoriously! Not because of who we are, but because of who’s we are.

Get to know God intimately

You should want to daily develop a closer walk with the Lord. It is important to get to know God intimately especially since you say you want to spend eternity with Him in Heaven. God is able to keep us in any situation. Knowing this in advance will help you to prepare for what’s ahead. Everyday on this side of Heaven is a precious GIFT from the Lord.

It is important to acquire some preventative coping skills, so you can become better prepared as you go through any turmoil and not become stagnated. See this as a time to allow the Lord to strengthen you. There is much spiritual warfare to undermine the importance of growing in the grace and knowledge of the Lord. To oppress, depress and distract you from daily drawing closer to the Lord. Reach out to the Lord. God has promised to be with us always! This is a promise you can believe and stand upon. God is willing and able to help us in every situation.

Know God and His Word for Yourself

Once the enemy knows and realizes that you “GET IT” that you are aware of his many entrapments, he will do all he can to harness and undermine your good intentions and influence and solicit others to try and help disrupt your life. You become a treat as well as a target. He will use those who are not believers who are weak to try and pull you down. He will also use believers who have been misinformed. Pray for Discernment!

Remember he loves darkness. Therefore he slips around behind you in the dark lurking to undermine your sincere efforts to shed LIGHT to a world that is ignorant of his many devices. But get this; he can not do anymore than the Lord allows. “Resist the devil and he will flee…” Fear not keep your focus upon the Lord and remember He can keep you in perfect peace. It is important to know God and His Word for yourself.

Put yourself in check and daily adorn yourself with God’s Spiritual Armor.

There is VICTORY in CHRIST JESUS!

CHRIST JESUS has the VICTORY over life, living, death and the grave! He did not die for us to live unhappy lives. Wherever you are and whatever you have been through the Lord knows. Our Lord wants us to have abundant lives in every way. He wants to daily multiply and manifest the Fruit of HIS SPIRIT within us who believe. We are to “Walk by Faith!” His Word is the necessary spiritual food to help us and His Joy is available to strengthen us. God wants to “supply all of our needs according to HIS riches in CHRIST JESUS!” Philippians 4

Always be willing to receive correction from the Word of God. Always be willing to readily repent whenever necessary.

http://alpha7.org/index.php?s=Getting++Your+Joy+Back+Part+4

Tags: balance, Christ Jesus, coping skills, Deliverance, depression, emotional healing, faith, Fruit of the Spirit, God, healing, joy, lonely, love, patience, pray, spiritual warfare, sustainer, turmoil, Victory, walk by faith

Healing Begins In Your Heart and In Your Home Part 2

July 20, 2018 by Elder/Minister DeBorrah K. Ogans
Filed under Behavioral & Emotional Health

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~ Healing Begins In Your Heart and In Your Home! ~

Part 2

STOP THE MADNESS

GOD really does have a better way.

Should children be corrected? Yes indeed! But think before your buttons are pushed like a remote control. Proper correction is always done in love. Learn to correct and control yourself before you try to correct them. If not don’t expect them to do any differently. For they will simply model your behavior. Do you treat them the way you want to be treated? Think about how You would feel if it were you, being treated the way you treat them… To break a cycle you must do something differently.

IF you don’t have self-control yourself; simply remove yourself momentarily from their presence unto you can discipline them properly. Afterall you are supposed to be the responsible adult. Begin to set yourself and them free at the same time. Admit you need to develop healthy boundaries. You become what you practice. Yes, please do correct them and also correct yourself. REPENT!

LET’S STOP the VIOLENCE! Violence begats violence. There is too much violence going on all throughout this world. Get BETTER, not bitter. Get real, this does not have to be. Many have lived wrong for so long this is all that they know. Get aware and make it a point to lessen the frequency of emotional, mental & physical, abuse and really EMBRACE LOVE! Remember; LOVE IS PATIENT! Not the distorted worldly definition of love but GOD’S LOVE that corrects, protects, makes, awakens, shapes and molds us in HIS IMAGE! GOD’S LOVE allows the FRUIT of HIS SPIRIT to flourish and abound within us. GOD’S LOVE lasts through ETERNITY!

FRUIT OF HIS SPIRIT

“But the FRUIT of the SPIRIT IS LOVE, JOY, PEACE, PATIENCE, KINDNESS, GOODNESS, FAITHFULNESS, GENTLENESS and SELF-CONTORL. Against such is NO LAW. Those who BELONG to CHRIST JESUS have CRUCIFIED the sinful nature with its passions and desires, Since WE LIVE BY THE SPIRIT, let us KEEP IN STEP WITH THE SPIRIT. Let us become NOT conceited, provoking and envying one another…”
GALATIANS 5

WORKS OF THE FLESH

“THE ACTS OF THE sinful nature are obvious sexual immorality, impurity, and debauchery, idolatry, witchcraft, hatred, discord, jealously, fits of rage, self-ambition, dissensions, factions and envy; drunkenness, orgies, and the like. I warn You, as I did before, that those who live like this WILL NOT INHERIT the KINGDOM of GOD…”
GALATIANS 5

There is no power that even comes close to our OMNIPOTENT GOD!!! Aways keep in mind that GOD is also OMNIPRESENT so you can call upon him 24/7. He can help you. It is by HIS marvelous grace we can become more and more disciplined… He is able in any and every situation to help you rise above anything that attempts to make you focus or lose control. It could be something as simple as pushing away from the table. Or knowing when to speak softly or yes when to speak firm & strong. Healthy boundaries keep us in line and teach us to exercise self-control… PRAY FOR DISCERNMENT! Know that there are those who will attempt to test you far beyond anything that they themselves could ever endure. Remember we access GOD’S POWER. But we never become the power. This is why we ALL are forever dependent upon our LORD & SAVIOR CHRIST JESUS.

Learn to trust GOD!!!

Live to Please the LORD in all that You do. DON’T just go to CHURCH. “BE GOD’S CHURCH EVERYDAY & EVERYWHERE!” Scripture is powerful. It is our necessary essential Spiritual Food. It is required in order to properly grow spiritually. “DO NOT CONFORM to this world! “Therefore, I urge You, brothers, in view of GOD’S mercy, to offer your bodies as living sacrifices, HOLY and pleasing to GOD ~ this is your spiritual act of worship. DO NOT CONFORM any longer to the pattern of this world, BUT BE TRANSFORMED by the RENEWING of your mind. Then you WILL BE ABLE to TEST & APPROVE what GOD’S WILL IS! HIS GOOD, PLEASING & PERFECT WILL.” ROMANS 12 (NIV) Be led by the Spirit of God!

GOD does not ask us to do something that is not possible. It is through HIM we are able to do what seems impossible to man. Whenever we solicit HIS HELP we should first desire that whatever we are asking for is in HIS WILL! GOD always knows what is best for us!

WALK IN THE LIGHT

It is very important to KNOW the difference between; THE FRUIT OF THE SPIRIT & The works of the flesh. To every problem GOD has a solution. We just need to seek HIS WILL & HIS WAY above the ways of man/woman. Look all around you and see with your spiritual eyes. Things have gotten out of hand. Think globally and look universally; See what is happening to families, marriages, relationships, governments, cities, nations, countries, life, within the Church and living life as a whole…

No doubt the horrendous impact of the Coronavirus plague and pestilence, is a resulting consequence of what has been going on all throughout the world. All have been impacted one way or another. Remember it is still here. God’s Word is being fulfilled right before our very eyes. We have to continuously learn how to live safely & wisely as the Word of God continues to be fulfilled all around us. Time out for foolishness. Things have gone too far… The “Latter Days” are upon us.

There is always HOPE in the LORD!

God is speaking we must get better at listening. Therefore, we ALL need CHRIST JESUS as our personal SAVIOR and LORD and HIS HOLY SPIRIT; HIS COMFORTER. HIS HOLY SPIRIT WILL LEAD US to ALL TRUTH! As we walk in TRUTH we allow the LORD to bring healing to our hearts, minds, bodies, souls as well as our homes… GOD IS THE GOD OF ALL COMFORTS! Begin to really TRUST GOD & HIS WORD and “WALK IN THE LIGHT!”

Healing Begins In Your Heart and In Your Home Part 3

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Did You Grow Up in the Church? Part 3

April 8, 2016 by Elder/Minister DeBorrah K. Ogans
Filed under Christian Living, Church

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Did You Grow Up in the Church? Part 3

“There really is a difference between being in the Church and the Church being in you? When the Church is in you the Holy Spirit becomes the governor of your soul. You live in the world, you are to be a law abiding citizen but you realize it is in GOD you LIVE and MOVE and have your being. You are convicted whenever wrong. You readily REPENT! You do not desire to be right just for the sake of being right.

The Church is not just a place to go. It is who are! For you it is or should become your daily lifestyle to live to please God!

This is not some unrealistic, legalistic, rigid, mythical, unattainable, cultic way of being. You don’t or shouldn’t just follow someone because they are your friend… You should follow Jesus! Church was never meant to become a mere social club where everyone feels comfortable. You should realize how vitally important it is to live your life before the Lord. As a believer, You should know without a doubt that God is your Heavenly Father. That the devil his imps and no one or nobody can do anything to pluck you out God’s hands. That you truly belong to God and Jesus is your Lord and Savior! You have been adopted into His family and you know that you know that you know without doubting you are His child! Do you know what His Word says about being double minded?

Wait I must caution you!”
(The above was worth repeating just in case you are only reading Part 3)

If you have not been raised in the church DO NOT be discouraged! Read on because the Lord has a place for you as well! You are like a fresh breath of air because of your desire to embark upon a new beginning… ALL the same privileges of becoming a Child of GOD awaits you. ” Our Father, who art in Heaven. Hallowed be Your Name. Your Kingdom come, Your will be done on earth as it is in Heaven…”

You see, there really is a difference when you are in the Church and the Church is in you. You know that you have been bought with a price. You know that before you were formed in your Mother’s womb God knew and knows who you are. You also know it is not because of anything you have or have not. It is because of who He is! You can praise Him not only in the building; but you praise Him in your home, on your job or at your business in your car, in the midst of trials and persecution. Not just in mere lip service. You Praise the Lord when you are alone!

There is no need to act when you know that the Lord is totally aware of what we all do. Yes express yourself. Don’t be a chameleon and blend right in… Please, don’t be pressured because of a need to be accepted. We ALL will have to answer to Him for our actions. It is important to know that you have a right to not conform for the sake of being momentarily accepted. There are many things that have been integrated into worship and ministry to get others to conform. There is often a desire to generate a high energetic emotional worship & praise time. Many become emotionally charged. Praise & Worship is Great! Many do not realize the power of or behind music… In these latter days there is much more focus placed upon how your are feeling and what you can receive from the Lord. Worship & Praise should be a time devoted to God and who He is and what he has done and will do.

GOD IS A HOLY GOD!

God does not need any of us. Always remember; “…It is in HIM we LIVE and MOVE and have our being…” GOD is infinite and we are finite. This is not about undermining the validity of GOD’S CHURCH! This is about learning to exercise your RIGHTS and the FREEDOM you have wherever you decide to worship in a place that claims; ” HE IS LORD!” There are a plethora of places of worship all over the world. But, GOD has but ONE CHURCH! HE is the GOD of Abraham, Isaac and Jacob we serve as Believers.

Pray, Pray & Pray some more. Allow the Spirit of the Lord lead you. Let the Lord lead you what to do or not to do… God really does want to make a difference in your live everyday!

When you do not always respond in the way expected it is highly likely you will be misunderstood. You will also begin to actually better understand why others do not understand you. I always say; “Some things will not be understood on this side of Heaven!” What is always most important is to seek the will of the Lord above everything and everyone. Know that Jesus was grossly misunderstood. It is true God’s people are peculiar! God wants to strengthen your faith and trust in Him. You can stand even when you know others have done everything possible to try to discourage you. Keep Your focus on the Lord. God wants each of us to become the “Best You” in HIM! After all He is our Creator.

God is awesome! Standing for God does not mean resorting to carnality. Your confidence cannot be in you, are anything else. Yes, you can have confidence because you know God as your Father. You know that He knows you as His child. You know and He knows that you have spent some deep intimate time together in His presence. You are growing and so is your understanding of who He is. You know that He has set you free! You know that you have been raised in the church and the church is in you. Or You have come to know that now you are His Church.

God really has a better way for His children. God is not a respecter of persons. It does not matter to Him if you are rich or poor, black, white, red, yellow, tan or brown. He already knows where you live, work, play or “hang out.” He even knows if you have been raised in the church and the church is not in you. He knows if you walk in the flesh or abide in His Spirit. If you truly invite Him into your heart today He will come in your life and make a real difference. If you have not been raised in the church God can place His laws within your heart. It even may give you a different advantage. You see and observe and you wonder why? Know that the Spirit of the Lord is Omniscient and The Lord can teach you whatever you need to know. GOD will never lead you to do anything that goes against HIS WORD! It is important to make spending time in God’s Word a priority. There is and endless wealth of Spiritual Food for our souls in His Word. As you begin to grasp His Word it will wash you and cleanse you from all unrighteousness. As a new believer you are not as weighed down with many of the traditions of man. You are should feel free to ask what this or that is so wherever you worship. Ask unto you have an inner peace. Make studying God’s Word your new priority. In His time He will mold and shape you from the inside out. This is a continuous process. He will also teach you how to guard your heart.

There are many wolves among the sheep. Don’t fret God always takes care of His children even in the midst of tests and trials. There are also those who call evil good and good evil. God will and can protect you and keep you from the grasp of wickedness. You must learn to humbly submit to His direction. He will open your spiritual eyes so you can begin to have a deeper understanding about life. No drugs, nicotine or alcohol needed to enlighten you. You don’t want to live always under the influence of some substance. (This is not anti valid prescribed medications) Begin to be more prayerful about how you take care of your body. You want to seek to have better self control in all area of your life. You will not want to see things as they appear. You will desire to see clearly. Your conscious will become sensitive and you will have a deepened desire to do what is right in His sight rather than in the sight of man. Realize that Jesus came that we might have life and have it more abundantly in every way. HIS WORD is necessary SPIRITUAL FOOD for our souls!

God also said in the Book of John to “let not your heart be troubled.” It is very important to trust God and His WORD! The earth truly is the Lord’s. Truly He will take care of you. God already knows what is going on in your life and the life of those around you. Just begin to exercise patience. He will bring what happens in the dark to the light. Did you know you have as much time as you need to do the things that God would have you to do. Time belongs to God.

Study the story of Gideon. (See Judges 6) Gideon was nota likely leader. He prevailed not because of how many he had to help him. As a matter of fact the Lord told him he needed fewer people to help him. Gideon faithfully sought the Lord for direction. The Lord told Gideon; “Peace! Do not be afraid> You will not die!” There are many examples in the Word of God to help us in all areas of life. God will supply the necessary talents and resources for you to do whatever He wants you to do. He will supply the few or many you need to help you. This way He gets the GLORY and the VICTORY always belongs to GOD ALMIGHTY. It is not in the amount, how many are for you or against you. Nor in whoever rises up against you. It is in learning how to obey God.

God will make it evident to you and those about you that it is only by His grace and mercy that you can truly be successful. Spiritual success is not in the numbers. Fewer travel the Narrow Path. God knows when you have been raised in His Church and His Church is in you. He knows when you have not been raised in the church and it is your sincere desire to want to know Him. What matters to HIM is your willingness to allow HIM to mold and be shaped through His Living Word and His Holy Spirit. He wants us all to readily “REPENT!” whenever necessary. He is not a respecter of persons and His Love is extended to everyone all over the world. Through FAITH we learn to believe! This is why we are called “Believers!” Christ Jesus died on the cross for the sins of the world and He extends HIS LOVE to ALL! He wants to come live within your hearts through eternity and become your personal Lord & Savior! This world was spoken into existence through Him! As believers we are the sheep of His Pasture. The LORD wants to be your SHEPHERD! Remember this; “He leads me in the Path of Righteousness for His Namesake. Yea though I walk through the Valley of the Shadow of Death I WILL fear NO evil. For THOU art with me. THY ROD & STAFF THEY COMFORT me…” Psalms 23 Grace, Joy, Love & Peace to you in Jesus Name! If you really want to be happier, Live Everyday: “To God be the Glory!”

Tags: #righteous, alcohol, believe, Believers, Charles Stanley, Church, creator, drugs, faith, freedom, God, grace, heart, Jesus, Joel Osteen, joy, Joyce Meyers, kingdom, last days, Lord, love, Narrow Path, Our Father, patience, peace, relationship, salvation, saved, savior, Self Control, Shepherd, success, T D Jakes, TBN, trials and tests, under the influence, Word of God

Embracing the Fruit of the Spirit within your marriage “Patience” Part 4

January 8, 2016 by Elder/Minister DeBorrah K. Ogans
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Embracing the Fruit of the Spirit in your marriage “Patience”

Part 4

Patience is a marvelous virtue. Patience will help you discover a deeper perspective on what is really important. It affords you the ability to have fortitude and increasing self control as you put into practice the determination to not make hasty decisions. The Encarta Dictionary defines patience in this manner; “The ability to endure waiting delay, or provocation without becoming annoyed or upset or to persevere calmly when faced with difficulties.” It is not hard to see the immeasurable benefits of embracing patience within your marriage.

Embracing patience

When you begin to embrace patience in your marriage you make it a priority to think things through. Whenever either of you do become angry you should acknowledge and realize the need to activate patience. If you are not a patient person this is not at all easy. You have somewhat learned to blurt out however it is you are feeling and think later. This can cause you to say and do a lot of things that you will regret. You probably have become callous and a tad insensitive to how your spouse feels.

When your heart is hardened you don’t think about it at all, because it is no big deal. It is important to know you are hurting your spouse and creating an unhealthy environment. Your spouse will not readily share with you because they dread or fear how you might respond.

Take a good look in the mirror and see if you like what you see looking back at you. Are you happy or unhappy? If you are unhappy you need to change some things, but it is up to you. If this is the case, please do not let pride continue to get the best of you. Think objectively. For example, Do you respond to your spouse the way that you would like your spouse to respond to you? If you have not been getting the results that you want all the more reason to make a change…

There is hope and there is always room for improvement in all of us. As long as the Lord has us on this side of heaven we can grow. Make it a point to admit your shortcomings and strive to overcome your weakness. We all have strengths and weaknesses. This is why self-control is so important. Yes, we can take control to the degree we are able to exercise self-control. We will also later discuss the value of embracing self-control for it is also a Fruit of the Spirit! No, you don’t always get to have everything your way. Learn to become more patient. If you are angry wait until you are cooled down to respond rather than just react. Stop making excuses and begin to take control by exerting more self-discipline. Yes, you must begin to harness and control your weaknesses. This is good scripture to keep in mind “In patience possess ye your soul!” Luke 21

Make your marriage a priority

Patience is part of the Fruit of the Spirit. When you embrace patience, you also welcome intimacy. Developing a deeper personal and intimate relationship with God the Father our Creator is most helpful. This greatly benefits your marriage. Jesus Christ sacrificed His life on the cross for us. It is through Him we are able to experience the Fruit of His Spirit within our lives.

God has given us His Holy Spirit to help us and comfort us. His Holy Spirit leads us to all Truth! There is an inner deep peace that only comes from God! There is also hope in Him as well. “But hope that is seen is not hope at all. Who hopes for what he already has? But if we hope for what we do not yet have, we wait for it patiently.” Romans 8. A good marriage takes both spouses making the marital relationship a priority!

Make Love a priority!

Patience and peace work hand in hand. Peace grows as we wait patiently on something we desire. Love, care and concern must be a priority. You now learn to take time when before you rushed. Remember the saying; “fools rush in.” So do embrace patience. You now can begin to value your spouse for the unique individual they are. Your love blossoms. God’s Fruit becomes apparent. Now your marriage begins to flourish and blossom.

John teaches us about the peace of God and its marvelous benefits. “But the Counselor the Holy Spirit, whom the Father will send in My name, will teach you all things and remind you of everything I have said to you. Peace, I leave you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your heart be troubled and do not be afraid!” John 14.

The beauty of the Lord is that all His Word is true! God is omnipotent; meaning that He is all powerful. Any weaknesses or shortcomings are or can become powerless when we yield them to Him! You can then become a better you. Working together you both become stronger and happier. Remember, it is important to be kind to one another.

God wants our marriages to be fulfilling. He wants to impart His love, joy and peace and patience to us. Seek the will and way of the Lord above everything. For in Him are the answers to life and daily living. It is our choice to invite His presence into whatever is going on or happening within or around us.

It is important to spend time with the Lord each day. His Word is our necessary essential spiritual food. It enriches our lives, bodies, minds & souls. This way you stay attached to the source of all power. Let nothing separate you from God’s love. Be sincere with God. For, we can call on Him at any time wherever we are. The Fruit of His Spirit naturally begins to ripen within our hearts and our marriages when we do. Come what may we do not have to be dismayed or afraid when we choose to; “Be still & know that I am God!”

There are marvelous benefits when you both embrace patience in your marriage!

Part 5

Tags: commit, Embracing, Fruit of the Spirit, fulfilment, Holy Spirit, hurt, husband, Intimac, love, marriage, Marriage & Intimacy, pain, patience, spouse

The Narrow Road

January 9, 2011 by Elder/Minister DeBorrah K. Ogans
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It is through God’s plan of salvation we are given the gift of eternal life. Once we accept Jesus Christ as our Savior we embark upon a spiritual journey. His precious Holy Spirit comes to reside within us. The Holy Spirit is there to comfort, protect, lead and guide us. To help us understand what the Word really means. His Word is there to be a “lamp unto our feet and a Light unto our path.” In Galatians 5 you will find the Fruit of His Spirit and the works of the flesh. This will help you to know the difference between, when you are walking in the Spirit or walking carnally in the flesh. This is also another reason why it is so very important to know the scriptures for yourself. God will never lead you to do anything contrary to His Word. His Word tells us every now and then you will find a true believer. The scriptures actually say “Enter through the narrow gate, for wide is the gate and broad is the road that leads to destruction, and many enter through it. But small is the gate and narrow the road that leads to life and only a few find it.”

God loves us so much that He allowed His only begotten Son to leave heaven and take upon Himself a body of flesh. Jesus conquered sin in the flesh for us. So we might have the gift of Salvation! He was born, lived a sinless life was crucified dead and buried. Then he arose with all power! We never become the power, yet we are allowed access. Jesus truly demonstrated His love to us by actually showing us what it is to travel on that narrow road. If you study the life of Jesus Christ you will find that He encountered many things. He was persecuted, mistreated, lied upon and maligned. He was called evil. He was betrayed, misunderstood and abandoned by the very ones He came to help. The scriptures are not just some mere stories written to amuse us. They are there to show us the way. To help us grow spiritually mature and encourage us on that narrow road travel.

The Bible is supposed to be the final authority for the child of God. It is supposed to be our road map for life. As His children we are His Church. The Church is His Bride. One must remain watchful and prayerful. Life will allow many thorns and thistles in order to derail the child of God. That narrow road often appears to take the form of a roller coaster? For some taking a detour onto wide road traveling becomes an alternate route. Regardless as to what is going on about us we must strive to sincerely live each day keeping in mind that Jesus is going to return for His Church. This also helps you to be prepared for whatever obstacles are put in your path. One must learn to lay aside the things that attempt to distract or derail your path. So much of the world has been allowed to creep into the Church. For many it is hard to tell the difference. You must know the Word for yourself in order to not be deceived. Remember the Word tells us that the wheat and the tares are growing together. On many occasions evil is called good and good is perceived as evil. In many cases the world and its way has really become the final authority. Learn to trust God!

Lord help us! Don’t be dismayed! Absolutely nothing gets by God! God knows who are His. Rest assured. When you truly know His Word, you would know that nothing or no one can change that! God’s Word is TRUE! Jesus stood on the Truth. God knows what has happened, is happening and what will happen! We can rely on the Truth! People have an amazing ability to twist the truth in order to suit their purpose. To take things out of context in order to make things appear and seem a certain way. Some people will believe anything and anybody. You never have to force yourself or God’s Word upon anyone. Just be patient. Learn to “be still and know.” You do not have to stoop to their level. Just know in the long run it will only backfire. When anyone tries to oppress you, you never have to be afraid especially when you know that Psalms 27 is true! “The Lord is my Light and my salvation, who shall I fear….” Truth erases doubt and will give you a sure footing. It takes the Truth to bring things to the Light and dispel lies. God does not operate in the dark. There is nothing hidden or uncovered to Him! “Wait on the Lord.”

Study the life of Jesus. You will find that He was there in the very beginning and will be there through eternity. Many consorted together to derail Him. False witnesses were even hired to justify their case against Him. Simply so things could appear a certain way and cast doubt upon His credibility? To undermine His good intentions, perhaps with man but certainly not with God! Just to prove their case against Him. Jesus never sinned. He remained focused and faithful. We too must learn to keep our focus on God. You can rest assured when you know God knows the intentions of your heart. He knows everything. Romans tell us “Therefore there is no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus…” You do not have to walk after the flesh. Yes, we have all “sinned and fallen short of the glory of God.” But as you grow stronger spiritually we are to sin less. This is why we need a Savior. To help us stay on the right path. It is so important to know the Lord and His Word intimately. The Truth really can set you free! You can rely on the Truth! Not to just read it for the sake of reading. But to consistently study, embrace and digest its contents and seek your path forward. Get off that wide road traveling it leads to destruction. The Truth will untangle a multitude of opinions it will free you from a swamp of uncertainty. It is able to keep you on the right path. God really is able to keep you from falling!

The word scripture comes from the Greek word graphe, which means; what is written. The scriptures are truly the inspired Word of God. They were written to help us navigate through this maze of life. Many times Jesus said nothing. There were times He simply said “It is written.” God does not intend for us to be mislead. Narrow road traveling is possible. Difficult situations and suffering are a part of life. But so is His joy even in the midst of sorrows! He wants us to hide His word in our hearts. It is very important that you remain patient and be prayerful! Jesus wants us to be consistent and stable. Not to let how things appear sway you from what you know is right. In John 17 you will find another one of Jesus’ wonderfully recorded prayers; “I have given them your Word and the world has hated them, for they are not of the world any more than I am of the world. My prayer is not that you take them out of the world but that you protect them from the evil one. They are not of the world, even as I am not of it. Sanctify them by the TRUTH, your Word is TRUTH.” When you place your trust in Jesus you become sanctified. He will protect and keep you. You can rejoice and praise Him knowing He has a plan for you as well as each one of His children.

You can depend on God’s Word. It is here to help us through this maze of life. To nourish, feed, water, protect and cleanse us. It is there to keep us on the path that leads to Him! But there are some things that you need to know and expect, to help you live your life seeking His purpose. It really is not about how things look to others. Know who you are and who you belong to! Always be ready to give and answer for the hope that lies within! What is important is what God knows! Do you really know what it means when you say Jesus is your Savior? It means that you are now a child of God. I must tell you, you should know as well, you also become target practice for a lot of spiritual warfare.

It is true the saying that “the moment we admit life is difficult it becomes easier.” II Timothy 3 tells us, “In fact everyone who wants to live a godly life in Christ Jesus will be persecuted, while evil men and impostors will go from bad to worse, deceiving and being deceived. But for you to continue in what you have learned and have become convinced of, because you know from who you have learned it, and how from infancy you have known the holy Scriptures, which are able to make you wise for salvation through faith in Christ Jesus.” For the child of God what makes it easier is knowing that the Lord is there 24/7. “He will never leave nor forsake you.” His Word is there to comfort you, help and sustain you, guide you and see you through it all. Whenever you become burdened you must learn to take responsibility and then shift your load to Him. God will never fail you! He promises to “supply all of our needs through Christ Jesus” You must read, know, continuously study, trust and allow His Holy Spirit to illuminate His Word for your path forward. The Word of God is our road map for narrow road travel. Life is a quest. Jesus is the only way to the Father.

Quite often when you find your self in a difficult situation if you are not prayerful your first response will be to respond carnally or in the flesh. To impulsively respond and seek to gratify self or to blame others rather than take your part of the responsibility. This is again when it is important to know; “That the Truth does set us free.” God always has a remedy. One just has to be open and willing to take heed to His way. Remember that narrow path I’ve been talking about? Always remember the Fruit of His Spirit is available. Remember God has a plan for your life. His promises are true! Nothing is too hard for God. Keep your focus! Mediate on the Lord’s Word. The WORD of God tells us to “Do not be anxious about anything but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.” Philippians gives us additional insightful words to ponder when going through, “Finally my brothers, whatever is TRUE, whatever is NOBLE, whatever is RIGHT, whatever is PURE, whatever is LOVELY, whatever is ADMIRABLE, if anything is excellent or praiseworthy think about such things. Whatever you have earned or received or heard of Me, or seen of Me put into practice. And the God of peace will be with you.” God is awesome!

Tags: eternal life, evil, flesh, Fruit of the Spirit, God is Love, good, Jesus, Jesus Christ, narrow road, patience, salvation, spirit, understanding, wide road

What Does It Mean to Love? Part 1

December 28, 2009 by Elder/Minister DeBorrah K. Ogans
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What does it mean to love someone? Does it mean you give them everything they want? Does it mean letting someone run over you? Does it mean you tell them what they want to hear? Does it mean you never make them angry? Does love ever end?

Webster defines love in this way; strong affection for another based on kinship ties.

Example: maternal love for a child. Attraction based on sexual desire. Admiration or benevolence. Warm attachment, enthusiasm, or devotion. A beloved person: Darling. Brotherly concern for others. To hold dear. To feel a lover’s passion, devotion, or tenderness. An unselfish concern of God for man.

The scriptures tell us that “God is Love.”

Tell me can you really truly love someone and not know God? Or better yet to the degree you know God; does it help you love in a profound way? According to I Corinthians 13 LOVE…….is PATIENT…….is KIND…….does not ENVY……. does not BOAST……. Is not PROUD…..is not SELFISH. Keeps no record of wrong doings…….does not DELIGHT in EVIL….but REJOICES in TRUTH. Always protects. Always TRUSTS. Always HOPES. Always PERSEVERES.

Does your definition of love encompass Biblical principles? Guess what? Well, whenever the above are not in operation it is not love. We all should seek to improve how we respond in love. Guard the Love the Lord Blesses you with!

I have found that love is a term that many people use loosely.

If you listen clearly they usually base love on doing or not doing something for them. Love is not giving someone what they want. Love is not letting people run over you. Love is not telling people what they want to hear. If you love them you will speak the truth in love. Just know when you truly love people they will get angry with you sometimes! Learn to be “angry and sin not!”

I am eternally grateful that the LORD has bestowed His Love upon our lives and our marriage. I can say we genuinely love, appreciate and respect one another as husband and wife. It is not something we take for granted. We both are able to stand firm as individuals in what and who we believe in. Together we have faithfully allowed the Lord Center Place within our marriage. We have traveled the world together and thoroughly enjoy spending quality time with one another.

We are thankful to Abba Father God’s Holy Spirit His Comforter. There is never question as to His Divine intervention in bringing us together. This was confirmed by our late Elder Pastor/mentor. He told us it was important to not let anything come between the “circle” of our God given love. We have held his godly wisdom dear to our hearts for many decades… We have always appreciated and respected the spiritual “One-ness” that is attainable in “HOLY MATRIMONY!” It has helped us to weather the storms of life as well as the plethora of mountaintop experiences. We enjoy, genuinely love, respect, trust without doubt and care passionately for another. Know this in God’s eyes “The marriage bed is undefiled!” By God’s grace we have raised our children in a balanced, loving, healthy, stable, safe environment. This is something our children can also attest to. Christ Jesus is our best witness.

I am most thankful for God given coping skills.

There is a Joy and an unexplainable Peace that is present even in the midst of sickness, sorrow, contention or spiritual warfare. The HOLY SPIRIT is a wonderful SPIRITUAL COUNSELOR! GOD’S TRUTH is POWERFUL. It will not allow you to freely move in denial but rather seek TRUTH. (ABSOLUTELY NOTHING ANYWHERE IS HIDDEN TO THE LORD) A lie will keep you in bondage. There is no place in truth for delusional illusions to persists. I/we Thank the LORD for “Sound Minds!” And an undoubtable constant awareness of GOD’S OMNIPRESENCE everywhere you are. Always seek the TRUTH above all else… I fully realize without the Lord I am nothing but walking breathing shaped formed dust. Yet in Him I am confident knowing that within me His Holy Spirit resides.

As we submit to the “WILL & WAY” of the LORD HIS HOLY SPIRIT leads us to ALL TRUTH!

It is important to readily strive to resolve conflict. It only serves to limit your own “Walking in the Spirit!” Feelings need to be validated. Discipline needs to be embraced when responding or not responding. Confrontation exercised from the perspective; “this is how you feel” Be willing to “REPENT” whenever in error. Choose freely the path of spiritual growth Move forward allowing the Lord to build your character. Don’t let life make you bitter always strive to “BECOME BETTER!” Life is so very precious and you do not want to spend the majority of your marriage and your relationships in “much ado!” You get stronger in this as you practice it.

There are those who have lived with much turmoil.

Rather than seek to resolve their inner turmoil they tend to continue to create it. They will often project how they are feeling upon you. Pray for Discernment!

Whenever you are dealing with someone who does not really understand love they will often misinterpret your intentions. Their perspective of you will fluctuate. They base everything on their feelings. Not usually looking at what they have done or said to make the relationship go south. Yet, you suddenly are no longer the kind wonderful person that they thought you were? All of a sudden you will be perceived as being cold, uncaring, and selfish. But yesterday you were the greatest… But now since you won’t let them have something or do something you are cold. Yet they have done little or nothing.

Go figure? Watch the double mindedness. They will accuse you of not really loving them when you don’t give them what they want. Know they are hurting and want you to hurt too. This is not the case in a healthy marriage or relationship. Even when you disagree you will reinforce your love for one another. You know one another and don’t try to reduce one another to a lower standard. You can disagree respectfully. Patience is key!

Don’t fret! God knows your heart. Pray for them. (In a trusting relationship you don’t go here…) Stand fast. Be patient and allow the Lord to bring what is really happening to the forefront. Don’t manipulate or don’t allow anyone to manipulate you. Seek the Lord fervently for direction. In the meantime pray for them. Begin to practice healthy boundaries with them. Or you will engage in a continuous cycle of dysfunction.

Many people are angry about life in general

There are many angry people who will chew you out at the drop of a hat. They have oodles of pent up unresolved anger. Cancer, high blood pressure, eating disorders, temper tantrums and depression are just a few results of stored anger and or unresolved conflict. It’s okay for them to have a tantrum. Its okay for them to vent and rant. Its okay for them to do very little. Like a spoiled child they want what they want right now. Usually at your expense. You are of course prideful yet they are justified. You are expected to appease them.

Anger is natural. It takes discipline to combat anger. Encourage them to learn to be patient and find healthy ways to express their anger. Suppressing anger is unhealthy. Just know it takes more control to not respond than to throw a fit. Did you know you can be angry and sin not?

By the way you must let go of some people you love. I am not talking about letting go like in divorce. Divorce occurs because two adults are not able to work through whatever problems they are experiencing. They are not able to keep the commitment they made to each other for whatever reason. Often this is because they really didn’t think things through first. The responsibility to nurture the marriage is not mutual.

Live and Thrive to build a lasting marriage

Many couples are unaware of the necessary tenacity for building an enduring marriage. There are also those who come to marriage to get rather than to give. They have been so hurt that they remain insulated from learning how to really love and keep the vows that they made. Sometimes they will exit selfishly living behind a wall of shame… (But that’s another column/sermonette). When I say letting go I mean putting them in hands of the Lord. Allow Him to intervene.

There are those who just enjoy a habitat of tension and confusion. They will often go the mile with a coworker or a friend and their spouse receives the leftovers. Therefore their relationship suffers. Or as a friend you will have to carry the load the majority of the time. They tend to participate in just about everything at their place of worship, or work related activities, yet their home life suffers and takes secondary place. Their need for acceptance by others is their main priority. This should not be. It is clear that they don’t perceive or understand God’s Omnipresence.

Anger and dysfunction need to be confronted. Avoiding conflict is not healthy. Did you know you could break unhealthy cycles by employing better ways to resolve conflict? Allowing a cooling off period before discussing the problem may be helpful. Always seek direction from the Lord He will never lead you wrong. He will help you to humble yourself. Learn to walk in meekness. Which is power under disciplined control.

Sharing a one sided account of what has happened to your friends will not help your relationship. It may get you some momentary support. But it won’t help you to grow spiritually. Words spoken in a fit of anger can be very damaging. Taking responsibility for your actions is always a step in the right direction. Letting go and allowing them space to feel the consequences for their actions can be beneficial to their spiritual maturity.

The world is a very inconsistent place.

God’s standards are not often respected nor appreciated by many. This is true in ministry as well. God must be the central focus of your life and relationships for true successful living as a believer. Life will present challenges. But with the help of the Lord; He can and will deliver you through it all. The prophets pleaded over and over with God’s people to return to His principles. But many still preferred to do their own thing. Knowing the WORD of GOD for yourself is important. God wants to be first in your life. Remember after all you claim you belong to Him?

As believers we have been grafted into His family. He wants us to know Him through His Word. God has instructed us to; “Hear O Israel: the Lord our God is one Lord. And thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thine heart, and with all thine soul, and with all thine might. And thou shalt teach them diligently unto they children and talk of them when thou sittest in thine house, and when thou walkest……. (Deuteronomy 6) God loves us and is faithful. ALL HIS WORD IS TRUE.

“GOD IS LOVE!” HIS LOVE LASTS THROUGH ETERNITY

Love will help you weather the storms of life. Love must be balanced. The term “unconditional love” is often misused today. I often hear SOME SAY; “I can do without your kind of love.” Well, “your kind or my kind of love” is not love at all. This is really more about how you are feeling in the moment. Remember, God sets the standard for love, for “God is Love” Unless we measure it by His standards it’s merely subjective opinion. For example; the more I don’t rock your boat you love me. Once you rock my boat I tell you to get out. Now all of a sudden you cry, “You don’t love me anymore.” As long as I let you rock my boat it’s thought of as love. This does not have to be. WRONG! This is immaturity. How can something as important as Love be reduced to such insignificant terms. This is what I call “intoxicating affections.” It mimics love and doesn’t last.

Don’t get love confused with how you feel in the moment. You can not like what someone does and still love them. It is love that actually helps you to respond properly or not respond to them despite the way you feel. Somethings will not be understood util we reach Heaven. Remember God’s love rejoices in the truth! Although it can be painful shift through what someone says to you and see if there is any truth in it. Make an adjustment whenever necessary. This is how you shape your character. Beware of counterfeit love. When you have been truly loved you will know the difference.

In a healthy marriage or relationship you do not seek to reduce the love you have for one another. You take responsibility for your actions and how you are feeling.

There are only a few that find genuine LOVE.

But God really wants this for all of us. Love is precious! It is never too late to seek GOD’S LOVE! This is true if you are married or single. “Be ye perfect because I AM Perfect” God really does wants us to become perfect in HIM. Which means to become complete in HIM who IS LOVE! No one is flawless but JESUS. This is why we all need HIM as SAVIOR & LORD! HE says; we ALL CAN BECOME PERFECT in HIM! Scriptures tells us that love covers a multitude of faults. This does not mean we ignore or condone sinful habits. Don’t be deceived. There are consequences for sin. This is why it is so very important to know His Word for yourself!

Growing your love in a healthy marriage or genuine relationship should be a mutual priority!

We are living in some interesting times when some of everything is happening all over the world. The Spiritual Warfare in these “Last Days” has heightened. The devil’s agenda is to reek extreme havoc upon the children of God as well as those in the world. He will use whoever he can. He knows that time is winding UP!

Now is a good time to seek the Lord above all else. In the Word, God says; “Is anyone of you in trouble! He should PRAY!” James 5 Humble yourself before the Lord. Be encouraged for GOD always has a way to HIM 24/7…

See Part 2

Tags: #marriagebed, #marriagecounseling, #projection, admiration, affectiion, anger, boast, Comforter, coping skills, Creflo Dollar, discernment, doubt, dysfunction, envy, God is Love, Holy Spirit, hopes, Joel Osteen, Joyce Meyers, kind, last days, love, marriage, passion, patience, patient, perseveres, pray, Prayer, proud, romance, safe environment, selfish, sex, sexual desire, T D Jakes, tenderness, trusts, truth, unconditional love, undefiled, valentine's day

Be Anxious For Nothing

December 26, 2009 by Minister/Elder DeBorrah K. Ogans
Filed under Christian Living, Prayer

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Be Anxious For Nothing

Have you been waiting on the Lord to answer your prayer? Are you uncertain as to what direction to go? Are you physically sick, mentally disturbed or depressed or just at your wits end? Are you worried, discouraged or confused? Are you experiencing anxiety or restlessness? Are you caught up in some type of addiction? Or are you just plain tired of the same ole….? Are you looking for something different in your life? Do you know if you are really walking in the will of the Lord? God is always speaking we just have to get better at listening. Have you ever thought about what to do as you wait on His response? What ever your situation may be good or bad. How about just try thanking God daily for who He is! Try embracing abiding in the fruit of His Spirit! God is truly worthy of our praise. God already knows what is going on. Yes, it’s okay to talk to Him anytime? He tells us to “pray without ceasing.” But while you are waiting for a response how about listening to some of the things He has already told us? Just try spending time delighting your self in His Word. Rest assured you will begin to see clearer, feel better and experience His peace. What ever the case may be the Word of the Lord says; “Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus.”

God tells us not to be anxious for anything? This does not mean that you can not get excited. But if you continue to worry why pray? If you are still heavy laden. Guess who is carrying your burden? You are. “Oh ye of little faith.” Yes, God wants you to be concerned. But first He wants us “to seek first His kingdom and His righteousness.” So if you are feeling anxious. It means that it is important to check yourself. Check yourself by what someone thinks about you? By what someone says about you or by whatever …………? Of course not! The point is we are to take everything to God and be thankful whatever the outcome. Trust God and know He really does know what is best! If you have truly done this you will not be anxious. The peace of God will keep you. It will guard your heart and your mind. Not because I say so. But, because He says so and His Word is true. There is power in truly knowing God and power in knowing His marvelous Word. His Word is true!

God wants to be in every aspect of your life. But He does not force Himself on you. He does not have to. God is not like us that He has to go somewhere. He is already everywhere! “It is in Him we move and live and have our being.” There is nowhere that you can go where He is not. God is not like man, whatever our little finite minds think of Him, He is so much more! His Word says “if you make your bed in hell He is there.” If you have truly accepted Jesus Christ as your Savior you do not even have to worry about going to hell. Ephesians 1 tells us “Having believed, you were marked in Him with a seal, the promised Holy Spirit, who is a deposit guaranteeing our inheritance until the redemption of those who are God’s possession- to the praise of His glory.” There is peace and joy when you know that you truly belong to God! It is so very important to know God’s Word. God does not want you to walk in the flesh. Ephesians 1 also tells us God wants to “give you the Spirit of wisdom and revelation, so that you may know Him better. I pray also that the eyes of your heart may be enlightened in order that you may know the hope to which He has called you, the riches of his glorious inheritance in the saints, and His incomparably great power for us who believe.” Do you really believe? This is why He says to be anxious for nothing! Jesus, Birth, Life, Death and Resurrection really does make all the difference in the world. It guaranteed Eternal Salvation for the true child of God. God’s Word has power! Only God is Sovereign! His Holy Spirit will illuminate His Word. It will be a “lamp unto your feet and a light unto your path.”

God says His peace will transcend the understanding of man. This does not mean it will take you out in a mystical never never land. Although we are in the world we are not supposed to be of the world. For example John the Baptist was a fore runner for Jesus Christ. John lived to please God! He went about telling others to “prepare for the coming of the Lord.” To “Repent!” The Word also tells you that they thought that he was strange. He dressed strange. He ate strange food. John even told the king he was wrong to marry his brother’s wife. John was aware that they did not understand him. But he was not looking to be understood. He knew that understanding really comes from God. When someone does not understand guess what? John knew where he was with the Lord. It is more important that you know where you are with the Lord. When this is the case you will experience His peace that surpasses the understanding of man. He will also guard your heart.

God’s Word is so precious. It is full of scenarios and situations to let us know that He has everything under His control. There was much division and strife within the Church then, just as it is now! Earnestly begin to study the Old Testament. You will find that there is nothing new under the sun. God truly is the Great “I AM” Meaning He is and always will be! Is anything to hard for God! If you really know His Word you should know better.

Colossians tells us that through His Son Jesus Christ He spoke everything into existence.
Now that is power! We never become the power. We have access to His power. Not for our own use, but to fulfill whatever His will is in our life. How do you even know what His will is? Just know, God will not direct you to do anything contrary to His Word. God loves us so much that He has given us His Son as our Savior. He has the power to save you from allowing sin to reign in your life. How do you do that? By being strengthened in your inner being. God’s LOVE surpasses the knowledge of man. Remember what He says about being anxious for nothing, through everything with prayer and thanksgiving……. Jesus Christ even became flesh for us. He was the Word of God wrapped in flesh! Now how can this be? It is by faith we know without a doubt His Word is true! Well what is faith? “Faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see.” He tells us “it is through faith that we understand that the universe was formed at God’s command, so that what is seen was not made out of what was visible.” God’s Word is so profoundly deep. It is through the faith that God has instilled in us we know that His Word is true. It really isn’t about us. It’s all about Him! He even tells us that it is “impossible to please Him without faith.”

How can you be sure if you have true faith? Faith is not just some magical force. It is a gift from God. There is much crime, deception, tragedy and natural disasters about us. This is just the beginning. Hold on, God has everything under His control! God has done so many wonderful things for us. He has given us a plethora of examples to enhance our trust and faith in Him. God even knows your name. Remember He is everywhere! Faith will help you to persevere, to endure, to not allow anything or anyone to take your eyes off the Lord. It does not mean that you will not go through some things. Quite the contrary. Jesus is our ultimate example. He is the only one who lived a sinless life. Look at all the things that they put Him through. He overcame sin in the flesh for us. To redeem us from the curse of sin. This does not mean that life will just be a bed of ease. No, you will have to go through some things. The key is what you do while going through. If you want His peace you have to do things His way. If you want Him to guard your heart? Guess what? You are going to have to do things His way.

God gives us an example of life akin to a race. Great spiritual rewards await us when we do things God’s way. But in this spiritual race we do not run for the rewards. It also goes far above and beyond earthly merits or recognition. God knows why you do or do not do some things. He sees beyond the surface. Our eternal rewards cannot be altered by man. Hallelujah! Let’s look at a few of His examples. His Word tells us that Moses parents hid him through faith. Moses persevered because He saw Him who was invisible. His focus was on God. By faith Jacob blessed both of Joseph’s sons. By faith Abraham offered His son Isaac as a sacrifice. (By the way Isaac was not a little boy at the time. He was a full grown man.) We no longer have to offer blood sacrifices. Jesus was the ultimate sacrifice. Now we offer Him the sacrifice of our PRAISE! By faith Noah warned the people of the upcoming flood. (Guess what? It had never rained.) Through faith only Noah and His family were saved. By faith Abel offered a better sacrifice than his brother. I believe that Cain’s gift came from the ground that God had just cursed? This is really deep. His Word even tells us that Enoch walked so closely with God he did not experience death. Enoch was commended as one that pleased God. God took Enoch. Not because he was so good. Only God is good. God does not need our permission to do anything. He is God all by Himself! Hallelujah! God tells us that when we walk in the Spirit there is no condemnation. Furthermore He says “And without faith it is impossible to please God, because anyone who comes to Him must believe that He exists and that He rewards those who earnestly seek Him.”

Have you been waiting on the Lord to answer your prayer? Are you experiencing any of the things I mentioned earlier? Try delighting yourself in God’s Word. Repent! Try doing things His way. Sincerely draw near to God. Guess what? He will draw nigh to you. God’s Word has cleansing power. God’s Word is true. He knows if your heart is genuinely sincere. Hebrews says; “We are sure that we have a clear conscious and desire to live honorably in every way. I particularly urge you to pray so that I may be restored to you soon. May the God of peace, who through the blood of the eternal covenant brought back from the dead our Lord Jesus, that Great Shepherd of the sheep, equip you with everything good for doing His will, and may He work in us what is pleasing to Him, through Jesus Christ to Him be glory for ever and ever, Amen.” Do you want the peace that surpasses the understanding of man? Just remember to be anxious for nothing, in everything by prayer and petitions…….. Cast your cares and burdens upon the Lord. He will sustain you. “He will guard your heart and your mind. All praises be to the King of Kings and the Lord of lords! Let’s give Him the sacrifice of our PRAISE! To God be the GLORY!

Tags: anxiety, anxious, discouraged, patience, pray without ceasing, Prayer, restlessnessk, supplication, waiting on God, worried, worry

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Book Release! - Proverbs Daily Devotional by DeBorrah K. Ogans

Click Here to purchase your copy.

New Single “Pass Me Not” by Elder Randall Ogans & Dorian Ogans

Get Your Copy Here!

Know that You are not alone for God is Omnipresent!

There needs to be a balance in your life

Worship the Lord in Spirit and in Truth!

Life is full of many experiences

Get to know God intimately

Know God and His Word for Yourself

There is VICTORY in CHRIST JESUS!

STOP THE MADNESS

GOD really does have a better way.

FRUIT OF HIS SPIRIT

WORKS OF THE FLESH

WALK IN THE LIGHT

There is always HOPE in the LORD!

Embracing the Fruit of the Spirit in your marriage “Patience”

Embracing patience

Make your marriage a priority

Make Love a priority!

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Book Release! - Proverbs Daily Devotional by DeBorrah K. Ogans

New Single “Pass Me Not” by Elder Randall Ogans & Dorian Ogans

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