Embracing the Fruit of the Spirit within your marriage “Self- Control” Part 9 No. 3 of 3

Embracing the Fruit of the Spirit within your marriage “Self-Control”

Couple in Grass

Part 9 No. 3 of 3

Trust and good communication are crucial values within a great marriage. Transparency and intimacy are built upon trust. It is really important to not rush into making any decisions that will impact the rest of your life. Take time and first consider the consequences! There is always much to learn about one another. Keep your marriage exciting. Progressively work on building good communication skills. You can maintain the spark that brought you together. Or if you have allowed it to dwindle you can rekindle it.

Here are few final things to keep in mind

Make it a point to have some good healthy quality discussions before you jump heart first into marriage. If you are already married take the time to find out how your spouse feels, thinks and processes their thoughts and emotions. Please don’t just assume. Feelings need to be validated.

Have some deep heartfelt discussions. You need to really know what one another values.

You are two different individuals who must learn to walk together. It is possible but it takes commitment and transparency. Emotional intimacy is important in marriage.

 

Each marriage has its own unique dynamics. Here are a few suggestions and  questions to ponder and discuss.

 

What are your likes and dislikes? How do feel about children? What are your beliefs in regards to discipline? How do you feel about the manner in why you both handle discipline? How do you both resolve conflict? Who or what do they believe in? How do they feel about God and prayer? What are your spouses moral standards or convictions or do they have any at all… Is faithfulness important? What does it really mean to be faithful? Are there any abuse issues that need to be addressed? Are there any addictions? Is divorce an option? These are a few of the many things you want to discuss and ponder in order to build a better marriage!

 

When you both share the same  values, morals and goals it helps to build a healthier emotional bond. You have the needed components necessary to build a strong foundation  for your marriage. This also accelerates your marriage to a higher functioning level. 

 

If you do not have much in common you really need to have some serious discussion about what you are expecting from one another.  What are your goals for your marriage? You need to at least have  some idea as to the direction your marriage is headed. 

 

The growing trend today is to simply just change partners when you are not happy. Infidelity is a big No no. It is vaguely possible but few marriages ever really recover from continued infidelity.  Which really  is not marriage; but  it is a revolving door.  This  breeds distrust and insecurity.   Many proceed in denial not resolving the present void or distrust.  When trust has been broken  it must be restored or this will become a pattern. As adults you have the right to decide, but you always should consider the long and short term consequences. Divorce or continued conflict  is inevitable when not fully addressed.

 

I recommend taking some time to rid yourself of some of the baggage that you have been carrying before jumping into another marriage. All too often it is just pushed to the side only to rise and cause even greater problems the second or even third time around further down the road.  If you are already married work with what you have. Revisit your vows. Take inventory and then set some goals together. It’s important to make plans together.  Your marriage won’t just work itself out.

 

The grass looks greener on the other side of the fence. The TRUTH is its greener because they water it consistently, and feed and  take care of it. Your marriage will be what you both make it.

 

Now is the time to begin to exercise self-control as well as fervently embrace all the rest of the “Fruit of the Spirit.” After all you have  or did make a Covenant with one another and to God… This makes your marriage a Holy agreement. Therefore seek quality Holy Help whenever necessary.

 

Praying together is important! “Praying without ceasing” all throughout your day keeps you connected to the Lord.

 

Happiness is a choice, so you both need to decide to make this a mutual goal. There will be highs and lows. So always make love deposits of care, concern, love, respect, romance and thoughtfulness to your marriage. This will help you weather the storms. This helps you to rise above the storm.  You cannot change one another. But you can create a healthy atmosphere that fosters change. There is always room for improvement in all of us. You can help bring out the better qualities in one another. Or you can bring out the worst in one another. Take note of your personal progress. Work on becoming the “Best You.” Your marriage should always be a priority. Working together will have amazing results!

 

Exercising self-control is a choice. If you are weak in this area. Get right!  Rather than tearing one another down all the time build one another up! Chastise one another in love instead to encourage self improvement. Withdraw from nagging.  Don’t allow carnality rule your life. Have some good healthy dialogue and let what has hindered your marriage to this point go and move forward as partners.

 

No, you do not go forward in denial. Forgiving does not mean forgetting. It means that you have decided to let whatever it is go, and move forward not holding the offense against them. The past becomes a reminder of your decision to let go and move on. You make a point to consciously let go of the old offenses and make way for the new awaiting life.  This is a lifestyle change!  This is possible when you don’t allow  the past to  become the present…  Each day now becomes a new day for building a better marriage.

 

Welcome embracing all the “Fruit of the Spirit” in your life everyday. I assure you that in the long run, you will be much happier. Your spouse will also benefit greatly.  You can do it; because happiness is a choice!

 

By the way, if you are divorced, in the process of a divorce married or remarried make a sincere attempt to not involve the children in your disputes.  If you have; STOP!  DON’T TRY AND MAKE ADULTS OUT OF CHILDREN. They are already suffering because of the disharmony that they see or sense between you. Please don’t use them as message carriers.   It is selfish to use them for your emotional support.  You both are supposed to be their caregivers…  After all, your first priority should be for their emotional wellbeing.

 

The truth is you two were not able to resolve your own  conflicts. Children are more observant than you think. You have been in an emotional battle and it has spawned some residual hurt feelings. Their resentment will surface in many ways due to the collateral damage they are experiencing.  This may not have been your intention but there is a residual of resentment.  Give your children the opportunity to express themselves. But it is important that they are  always encouraged to be responsible and respectful.  Seek to break the cycle of dysfunction. They still need to learn how to develop healthy coping skills and so do you as parents.  Let this encourage you to model to them the “Fruit of the Spirit” as you all move forward together or  separately.

 

Be careful of who you receive counsel from or who you allow to speak into your marriage or your life. Be accountable to God for your behavior. Make sure that you own up to your contribution of whatever problems or issue your marriage is experiencing. Marriage is a team effort. But it does not necessarily take a team to destroy it.   By one spouse’s own willful behavior divorce can result.  It  does take both of you working together not against one another to make it work. 

 

Diligently seek the Lord’s direction. Make it a priority to take time to; “BE STILL and KNOW”
Psalm 46

 

As a believer it should always be more important to you to please GOD.
This does not mean getting caught up in activities. You must commit to spend time with the Lord in His Word and draw closer to Him. This is where  and how you will gain healthier spiritual strength.  There really is nothing more important. GOD IS OMNISCIENT! When you seek HIM above all else there are marvelous benefits. Know that  your body is the Temple of God. You need to feed and nurture your sou. Think and ponder upon  this for a moment; God is the Creator of Heaven and earth. He is the Creator of man and woman. No one knows better than He about anything. He can and will direct you in every area of your life.

 

Marriage God’s way can and does work. But you both must be willing to mutually embrace His godly principles and actually implement them within your marriage. God wants to be a part of every area of your life. God does not want you to spend your life unhappy or broken. But He does want you to take seriously the vows that you both made to Him. You can recover from this.  But recovery takes hard work! 

 

Everyday is a precious “GIFT” from the Lord. What you do with your life is your gift to Him. So, get busy building a marriage that lasts. May your efforts in Holy Matrimony prevail!

 

“But the Fruit of the Spirit is Love, Joy, Peace, Patience, Kindness, Goodness, Faithfulness, Gentleness and Self Control…” Galatians 5. May they manifest, multiply and abound within your lives and your marriage!

 

May God’s  Eternal Love begin to flourish and abound between you!

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Embracing the Fruit of the Spirit within your marriage “Self-Control” Part 9 No. 2 of 3

Embracing the Fruit of the Spirit within your marriage “Self-Control”

Couple in Grass

Part 9

No. 2 of 3

Marriage is a spiritual battle ground in this 21st century. Look around you! Division wants to nest itself within your marriage; so be aware. Have you noticed the frequency in which couples are divorcing? Why is this? Many enter into marriage without first really getting to know this person who they have promised to love and cherish.

Take the time to get to know one another better rather than to simply co exist. For your marriage to endure it is important to build a strong foundation.

 

Self-control is a viable component of a strong healthy marriage. There are many forces at works to create havoc within your marriage. One must pray for discernment. It is important that you make your marriage and one another’s wellbeing an important priority. Self-control when consistently exercised will help both of you enhance and safeguard your marriage.

 

Marriage is serious business and is not for immature people. Immaturity is ageless so just because you are getting older does not necessarily mean that you are ready. There are some things you need to consider. Selfishness and either spouse being self-centered will hinder your marriage from growing in a healthy manner.

 

Marriage ideally speaking is for one man and one woman who are in one way or another  flawed. Yet learn to rise above their imperfections.   Who desire to want to mature and grow together and become better individuals working together as a committed team. “ALL have sinned and fallen short of the Glory of GOD…” Therefore no matter how much we grow in the Lord’s  grace there is always room for improvement as long as He has us on this side of Heaven.

 

Each day we are to strive for the perfection that can only  be discovered in the Lord.  “GOD IS LOVE!”  It is in HIM  you can increasingly become complete. GOD would not say ” Be ye therefore  perfect even as your Father which is in Heaven is perfect…”  Matthew 5  If it were not possible God would not tell us otherwise.   It is with the help of the Lord we can become all that He has created us to be and become. 

 

Oneness in marriage is actually designed to a harmonic journey. Trust and security are components of a good solid marriage. You are aware that the Lord is Omnipresent. You reverently fear Him so you not only respect your marriage but the marriages  of others as well. Marriage should not be taken lightly. In the spiritual sense “two become one” as they are united and committed in their desire to grow in love. True Love has no end.

 

Always remember  and keep in mind what the WORD teaches us.  Each spouse should seek to become perfect in the Lord. This is not an unattainable goal. It requires dedication and perseverance. However it is quite often misunderstood from a carnal perspective. Becoming perfect in the Lord means to become complete in HIM. Everything that you will ever need for Life & Living can be discovered in an ever growing personal intimate relationship with the Lord.

GOD  wants us to be united in HOLY MATRIMONY! 

God would not tell us to be perfect if it were not so. In of ourselves we will always fall short. HIS Holy Spirit is always present to HELP US. HE IS THE ULTIMATE COMFORTER. As you begin to really embrace the TRUTH of HIS WORD you can responsively say; “I CAN DO ALL THINGS through CHRIST who STRENGTHENS ME” Philippians 4. It is our choice to become disciplined and constantly reach for HIS HOLY HELP!

 

In marriage you learn to give up “me ness for we ness!”

 

Self-control helps you to honor your marriage vows. You choose to not let the world and it’s ever changing morality influence your commitment to one another. Instead together you elect to influence the world. You confront issues in love. It is important to not let resentment fester. You embrace your vows and commence to live out your lives working together through any difficulties. You realize that it is mere spiritual warfare designed to pull you away from your Center. When God is truly the Center of your marriage, Your love blossoms and continuously grows as you soar through life and enjoy the many mountaintop experiences as well.

 

 

The Fruit of the Spirit are essential virtues that have precious intrinsic worth that will solidify your marriage. “GOD IS LOVE” Love is part of the Fruit of HIS Spirit. LOVE is truly a priceless GIFT from the LORD. When you both strive to build a healthy living environment that welcomes love, harmony; trust and respect together you really can build a fulfilling, satisfying strong marriage.

A godly marriage is Holy Matrimony. 

Part 9
No. 3 0f 3

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SEXUAL Problems for Christians Part 1

Part 1

The Bible Says A Lot About Sex

SEXual Problems For The Christian

In one of the Christian Counseling quarterly publications I receive, every single article discussed sexual problems. This really confirmed that the problems of this nature are definitely prevalent within the Christian Community. Many shy away from discussing issues that are of a sexual nature. It is quite evident that a plethora of the problems we are experiencing in this world today are rooted in improper sexual misconduct.

 

The Bible has a lot to say about sexual relationships. One of the main problems is that sex is more often than not practiced outside of the sanctity of marriage. God has said it is only within the marriage bed that sex is “undefiled.” Many have indulged in adultery, fornication and homosexuality and defiled the marriage bed.

 

Sex Outside of Marriage is Dangerous!

It is of no secret that time after time we see many men and women who fall prey to the pitfalls of sexual misconduct. Not fully realizing that sex outside of marriage is like “fire outside of the fireplace.” It’s dangerous! It will burn your house down!

 

You are setting yourself up for disappointment. You see sex outside the confines of marriage simply means; I am not fully committed to you. I need to be with you to see if we are physically compatible. I’ve been hurt before so I don’t really want to get too serious. Or my spouse and I don’t have a satisfying relationship so I’m really glad you are there for me. Or “I need you baby” if you love me you will do this for me?

 

This is only a few but there are so many more scenarios as well… Of course you have not uttered this in words. In the above cases your actions speak louder than words. Many simply do not really know what marriage is all about!

 

You want to take some time and think and ponder upon your marriage vows! There is always room for improvement. Hang them on your wall if you need to be reminded of what you promised to do! There are priceless precious spiritual benefits for keeping your marital vows. 

 

If you married someone who does not keep their vows.  They  have a problem…

 

God Can Cleanse You from all Unrighteousness

I have received many questions in regards to sexual problems. Many are trapped because they have nowhere to turn. Many women just don’t want to be alone so they offer themselves sexually, yet are physically unsatisfied. Many have been conditioned ignorantly to use sex as a tool to manipulate. Women who are used for sexual purposes are often thought of as mere objects. Many have been sexually abused causing them to feel low self worth. Often causing them to turn to drugs and  promiscuity or unwise counsel. This  further leads to a perilous journey of confusion, depression, anxiety and more issues…

 

This is not about putting anyone down. It is about sharing what GOD has to say about sex and relationships.  To motivate you to move towards GOD rather than away from HIM… Don’t settle when He has so much more instore for you.

 

 

Please know if you were sexually abused or if you are being abused now it is in NO way your fault! You can turn this around. Realize that you have been taken advantage of. This was an unrighteous act against you. Meaning; it was or is not right! Forgive yourself and don’t let this hold you captive any longer. God wants to release the pain your are carrying. God’s compassion  goes far beyond any life experience. Cry out to the Lord and say; “STOP it in the Name of JESUS!” Please hear me; GOD LOVES you and has so much more in store for you. Don’t let this be the theme of your life. Don’t let it rob you of a better future. There is cleansing POWER in the WORD of GOD! He can “cleanse you from ALL unrighteousness.”

 

 

Many have been taught that sex is no big deal! Everybody has sex and it does not matter if you are married or not. Especially if you are past a certain age or you have already been married. Or if you are not having sex something is wrong with you. You are not normal. But that is not the Christian perspective! You are giving parts of yourself away! This is why you feel less than… Your body is what protects your soul! You see God gives specific directions. The Bible says “for this cause shall a man leave His Father and Mother and cleave to His wife and they shall become one flesh.”

 

Let go and let GOD!

Sex outside the confines of marriage is dangerous emotionally. Why? It sets you up for possible problems that may not be apparent until much later?  You are compromising your values… You usually feel someone is looking down on you. This is regardless of how young or old you may be… You are also outside of the will of GOD!  Your decisions are between you and GOD. It is He that you want to consult if you are a believer.  It is wise to become more aware of HIS WORD. God always wants what is best for us.  He created us yet He allows us the freedom to choose. But it is important to know that will be consequences for your choices good or bad.  It is never to late to start making better choices. 

 

 

There is a deeper meaning to sex than the physical exchange. A bonding takes place. There is a magnetic chemical exchange. Within the confines of marriage a miraculous spiritual transaction is taking place! Your hearts can begin to become knitted together as one.  You grow in God’s grace and you want what is best for one anther as you commit to His Will. Did you know that scripture tells us “whatever you join yourself to becomes a part of you?”

 

Deep down you must know and feel that something is wrong, but you just can’t put your finger on it.  Sex outside of marriage  shows a lack of discipline.  In this 21st century just about anything goes. But not so in the eyes of God.   This keeps you from experiencing “the Kingdom of God is at hand.”

 

Some people just don’t practice good moral boundaries. They will sleep with anybody! Married or not married! Others have been erroneously taught that it really does not matter. Well; Its my body anyway! ” It’s just sex!” But is it really especially if you have confessed Jesus Christ? If it feels right we are not hurting anybody? From a Biblical standpoint just know you are outside the will of God! Anytime you choose to operate outside of God’s boundaries you can expect some trouble.

 

GOD SAYS; REPENT!

 

Take some time for an inner spiritual cleanse! Spend some time in the WORD of GOD! Ask the LORD to speak to your heart! It is time to really “Let go & let GOD”

SEXUAL Problems For Christians Part 2

Part 2

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SEXUAL Problems For Christians Part 2

Part 2

Is A Great Marriage Still Viable?

The answer is YES!!!

Today some have opted out of the marriage. Their spouse has not been faithful and or has not or will not repent. Divorce is also sought because both or one spouse was not honest when they married. It is not their intention to work together for a mutually satisfying marriage. Sad put true some marry to get what they can get and leave. Quite often they want what they want when they want it. Their first priority is what they want rather than what is best for the marriage. This can leave the injured spouse in a state of flux. He or she will often overcompensate by continually giving into to their endless wants even to the point of financial despair. This should not be!

 

What about the children?

Parental disharmony also causes additional conflict within the children. They pick up the vibe between their parents. The children wants become excessive to compensate for their void. Some children will begin to lie and sometime emotionally withdraw. Unconsciously they feel that their well being is a secondary priority. Children usually prefer that their parents stay together. They too begin to act out. The parent who is most concerned must or should then take responsibility and address the needs of the children. Since you are hurting, this is not easy but necessary. It important to instill within your children healthy boundaries.

 

 

All too often one or both parents will often over indulge the child or children. They begin to compete for the child’s attention. Rather than discipline they will allow the child to become an extension of them. The child then becomes their support. Children vary in their ability to mature. Some are more resilient than others. Children should not be encouraged to become companions for their parents. Nor should they be ignored. They should always be nurtured in a healthy way that further establishes the parent child relationship. 

 

 

You have a responsibility to your children. 

 

 

As they get older the children will begin to better understand. Their parents were not able to resolve their conflict which resulted in divorce. Right now in this 21st century we have a generation of children that are confused about “Marriage God’s Way” more so than ever before! Although it did not work for you the first, second or even third time; it is important to let them know that God has ordained marriage as the proper relationship for sex. Let them know there is  still hope for them for a successful marriage.

 

 

Our current and future generations of teenagers have fewer and fewer positive moral traditional role models. Too many fractured marriages and families. This also can cause some of them to question their own sexuality.  They wonder if marriage is still even viable? They are all to often seduced to seek alternative ways to satisfy their sometimes overwhelming desire to appease raging hormones… They are often pulled into experimenting with same sex relationships with their peers. Keep the lines of communication open with your children.  There are some who wait in the wings to support alternative lifestyles…  This can cause them to become confused sexually or possibly even have a tendency towards bi sexual or promiscuity? This does not have to be! 

 

 

As a believer you have a responsibility to explain to them what God says about marriage.  If you don’t the world is waiting to teach them otherwise. 

 

 

Freely share with them what God says about sex in a non threatening way. Keeping in mind you are not trying to incite rebellion. You want them to learn self-control. You want them to realize that there are consequences for our actions. God allows us the freedom to choose. Love is patient so if you are over anxious take some time and chill out. Exercise patience when you are talking to your children.  You more than anyone should be willing to model good behavior to them. 

 

 

You  can help prevent them from getting out of control. You can  lessen the frequency of this occurring by teaching them the importance of respecting their own bodies.   Yes, there is always an exception to the rule. Raising children  properly takes a lot of patience, time and sacrifice. If you  have  not done this get busy now. Letting them know that they are valuable and they have the right to say “NO” to anyone. But most important that they can honor God in their body and its never too late to start!

 

Yes! A favorable future marriage is still viable…

There is much spiritual warfare that attempts to draw our teens away from God’s natural design for sex. This is a vulnerable stage of life for them. Peer pressure is already a constant factor in their lives… How their bodies are beginning to develop is a concern as well. Many of them will not say how they really feel. They will tell you what they think you want to hear. They often will seek unwise advice. Therefore they can be easily led down an ambivalent primrose path that further adds to this already complicated period of growth and development! Instead abstinence and discipline should be encouraged!

 

Let them know that God is Omnipresent!

Think about this for a moment. Did you know that if no one practiced sex outside of marriage there would be no one to cheat with? Fewer broken homes! Fewer STD’S! Fewer Abortions! Fewer marriages ending in divorces where people are unable to reconcile their differences. In this day and age it is hard to  hard to imagine! God has given us His Word to protect us! He has even told us that there is “no temptation common to man that He has not prepared a way of escape.”

 

A committed married monogamous relationship is the only way that God honors a sexual relationship! He has provided and ordained marriage. You see God has designed marriage as the only proper way a man and woman can fulfill their natural sexual desires. He is not the designer of any other method. If you have been taught or thought otherwise you are being  fooled. I don’t care what Mommy, Daddy, Grandpa, Grandma, Aunt, Uncle, Friend, Doctor, Minister, Pastor. Bishop, Apostle or Foe has said there are consequences! You see it is time out for living in the dark. Especially if you have confessed to be a Christian! It is time to stand up and speak out for what God has said is right.

 

 

We must speak the TRUTH in LOVE! Many are so confused about what LOVE really means. They often misunderstand you when you try to LOVE them for real! Loving someone is NOT making them feel comfortable in sin. Nor is it forcing yourself into their personal space.  Pray for discernment.  Part of LOVE is correction with patience. Sometimes we have to simply “step back.” But always PRAY! This is why we ALL so need the LORD! “GOD IS LOVE!” God is always available to help us properly express HIS LOVE!

 

 

Sharing the WORD of GOD IS LOVING PEOPLE! So don’t water it down. Even if they don’t like it.  God is quite clear about proper and improper sex! Try reading Roman 1 for starters. Let them take up any objections with the Lord. At some point if they are really seeking TRUTH they will at some point understand.  They will eventually see it is because you LOVE them you want them to know what God says. 

 

 

True ministry is speaking forth and living out loud the Word of God. 

 

 

Let’s really  HELP this next generation; these teenagers of this 21st century “where anything goes.” Start by giving them better moral role models! Let’s open up the lines of communication so they can validate their feelings.  They can learn to shift through their feelings and make better choices.   Make yourself available to your children. Give them a phone and tell them “to call you anytime they NEED you” HELP them so they do not feel that they have to give parts of themselves away in order to be accepted. If necessary also tell them to REPENT!  Let them know that they have the right to say NO to anyone who tries to take advantage of them. Give them more safe  “hugs” & quick kisses on their foreheads. (some of them feel too big for kisses) 

 

Give them respect and teach them how to be respectable and to demand respect as well. Remember they watch what we say and do.  Make a commitment to be loyal and faithful in your own marriage. Give them better examples and less criticism and more compassion and understanding.  Don’t encourage them to be sensual.  Lovingly  tell them when and if they are wrong. But be willing to admit when you are wrong as well. Less bickering and fighting and more constructive ways to resolve conflict such as powerful, loving biblical instructions.  Just think if it is hard for adults, it is even harder for teenagers… Lead them by example. 

SEXUAL Problems For The Christians Part 3

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SEXUAL Problems For Christians Part 3

 
Part 3

Pray for Discernment

When I went to seminary I was somewhat disappointed to a small degree, but not surprised that the same problems existed. We live in a spiritual war zone. So always seek the “Will & Way of the Lord.” I have learned that sexual misconduct is practiced on many levels. It did not matter that my views were misconstrued as prudish because I know better!  This is not at all about exposing anyone; nor would I. It is about stating the facts to circumvent others from going down this path or at least help them consider making better choices.

 

It is important to keep in mind that spiritual warfare persists everywhere. Always remember; “For where two or three gather in my name, there am I with them.” Matthew 18.   It is always good to have someone who you are on one accord.  Praise  & Thank God! Always keep in mind that God is omnipresent so therefore everywhere you are He is also there.  Like it or not. If you are “Called” to ministry your first commitment should always be to please the Lord. To freely share the Word of God and encourage  any and everyone to abide by His Word regardless of their title, or  whoever they are. Christianity is a daily lifestyle. God holds each of us  accountable for what we know.

 

 

In Seminary there was an interesting counseling therapy class on “Gethsemane Patterning.” I was asked to sign a waiver in this class because there was some hands on activity that could possibly be a tad interesting.  I prayed about it. Since I could see under the right conditions it could be in some cases helpful in ministry when used appropriately. I grasped all the marvelous insight as well as impertinent methodology. It is also important to know your rights.  I decided to opt out of certain aspects of the class. Therefore there was no need for me to sign a waiver. We are called to be observant. Thank God for Discernment. That particular class ended up with a huge lawsuit against the administrator. I learned early  it is important to never throw caution to the wind.

 

Many hours of intense personal study, quiet meditation and practical application yielded a deeper invaluable reverence for our Lord.  We must always consult the Lord to lead us.  It also freed me to be more spiritually conscious.  God does not want us to be “Cookie Cutter Christians.” There is no need to compete in ministry. The Lord will help us do whatever He has called us to do.  His confirmation exceeds anyone else’s,. This is not about ego for I have learned to be confident in the Lord. God  does want us to be “in the world but not of the world” John 8.  I am most thankful for the experience as well as an invaluable wealth of spiritual insight gained. There remain many many more  precious memories I have than not so good..

 

The Lord always wants to lead us on the Path of Righteousness.

 

To know GOD”S WORD is good. But it takes His Holy Spirit to open your understanding so you know how to apply and or receive it.  It was good that the Pharisees knew the Word.  The problem was that they were not able to recognize and discern Christ Jesus.  Strive to study like the Bereans.  They diligently studied to know and grow in the grace of our Lord & Savior through His Word. 

 

There are many different denominational and nondenominational beliefs. Therefore, it is always good to be cautious, prayerful and seek direction from the Lord. Especially when you lay hands on someone who does not really know you. Or when you know you are amidst others who have a wrong perception of your intent. I understand why the Word says: “Do not be hasty in the laying on of hands, and do not share in the sins of others. Keep yourself pure.”  I Timothy 5.  No need to fear. Truly the Lord will protect you. He also sharpens your discernment. Spiritual things easily get misunderstood when in  the midst of carnal thinkers.  For; “Man looks on the outside. But GOD looks at the heart.” This is why we always need to consult with the Lord and be led by HIS Holy Spirit! There are times when you may just have to stay put and pray from right where you are. You can always pray and sometimes not necessarily out loud. The Lord knows if we are sincere and HE is always absolutely Omniscient…

 

God Is Truly Amazing!

There is a tendency to sometime overlook sexual problems within the Church. This is not good since this conflicts with; “…But the hour is coming, and now is, when the true worshipers shall worship the Father in Spirit and Truth, for the Father seeks such to worship Him” (John 4:23).” Here Jesus is talking to the woman at the well. This in itself was unusual for Him to be alone in her presence. Notice; He first talked to her about her life and all of her husbands. Then He graciously shifts the subject to telling her about “true worship!” Jesus was always totally aware and connected to the LORD.  He was never not GOD! He simply told her something that no one was aware of to get her attention.  She left His presence preaching delivered  and: “Come see a man…”

 

 

We cannot confine our infinite Lord to just a geographical area, people or building. HE IS OMNIPRESENT I have not found anywhere in the WORD where any of  His disciples  themselves had sexual misconduct problems.  Know how to keep your Temple, for it is where GOD resides.  Think about it. Most importantly this sends the wrong message. There is a difference between the “Fruit of the Spirit and the “works of the flesh” See Galatians 5

 

Know and discern when a “seducing spirit” is in operation.  Seek the Lord’s direction and pray  whenever you are in an emotionally charged environment. God does not manifest His presence  to bring confusion…  Know that God wants to impart peace and bring deliverance.  You can even bring peace to a dog if necessary when led by the Lord.  His Holy Spirit is the Ultimate Comforter!

 

We are not to sanction any sin in anyone.  This only helps to keep them in bondage. Sin  is what separates us from GOD. We are to exercise and encourage others to embrace self-control as well. He has given us HIS HOLY SPIRIT HIS COMFORTER to HELP us. GOD CALLS us and asks us to travel upon “The Straight & Narrow Road!” This is the road that is less traveled by many.  The reason why there are so many carnal problems with God’s Church is because to many allowances and excuses are made quite often for those who are connected to what they perceive to be their hierarchy.  They will often have a cult like mentality.  They also tend to be very territorial. Absolutely NO one is higher than GOD! His Word says; ” Of a TRUTH, I perceive, God is not a respecter of persons.” James 2

 

 

We are ALL SAVED by the GRACE of GOD! It is not by any works…

 

 

It is so very important to know the WORD of GOD for yourself. Many teach the traditions of their particular denominations over the Word of God! We in ourselves have no power. But we can access HIS POWER as we stay connected to HIM as the SOURCE of ULTIMATE POWER.  Our bodies are His Temple.  He resides within us.  God knows when we are committed to Him. God can use whoever is willing to submit to His Will & His Way.

 

In some cases just as long as you pay your dues or tithes you can be excused from just about anything. You are given their unconditional love and support?  Know  God’s true Love is priceless… The focus upon giving money is the greatest priority for many.   The desire to take care of  and maintain the building and its auxiliaries  are usually a main priority. Not that this is bad but keep in mind that God is aware of those needs as well.  Many are manipulated to give money for various needs. There are even tithing messages given before  the offering.  They  often will give a binary message.  They will tell you how much you should give and then knowingly attempt to put a guilt trip on you to give  the 10% you know you owe?   Is that because you are not giving to them?  Giving is good.   But know God does not need our money. He does not need anything from anyone.  Malachi is mainly talking to the priests who were quite  corrupt.  This is the main scripture that is usually  used. However it is taken out of context by many. It was written to correct many poor  religious and social behaviors. Most always attribute Malachi to “robbing God!” Malachi 3 There are many ways to rob God.

 

GOD LOVES A CHEERFUL GIVER! 

Allow the Lord to direct you when, to whom and how much to give. If you study you will find that tithes and offerings were not necessarily monetary. They were staples and food  that were stored in the storehouse so there were provisions for  the  priest to have food to eat.  The priest were not land owners. They usually solely worked for the Lord with very few possessions. Malachi 3 also states; “And they shall be mine, saith the Lord of hosts, in that day when I make up my jewels; and I will spare them, as a man spareth his own son that serveth him. Then shall ye return, and discern between the righteous and the wicked, between him that serveth God and him that serveth him not.”

 

GOD KNOWS WHEN WE TRULY SERVE HIM! 

 

Yes, The Lord wants us to give. “God loves a cheerful giver!” II Corinthians 9. The Corinthians were a very carnal Church. Here  in Corinthians you will see that the LORD gives a lot of instructions to His Church because of the mindset of the people. They got carried away in many areas. The main focus of worship should always be upon giving GLORY to the LORD. God wants to be a part of every area of our lives. He has promised “To supply ALL our needs according to His riches in Christ Jesus!” Philippians 4. God will also supply the needs of HIS CHURCH which is HIS people. He will supply the needs in every aspect of our lives.  ALL with the LORD means ALL.

 

Tithing was never meant to be a “Cover Charge” to worship & praise GOD!

 

“For the Love of money is the root of ALL evil” Where you find evil when you peel it all back you will always find this is to be true! It is not the money but the fact that some will do just about anything to get it.  Know that God is aware of this as well. God does not begrudge us to have things. But it is how we relate to them that matters most. We all so daily need His Holy Spirit to continually grow in His grace.  Everything belongs to the Lord. God will not only supply our needs but He will also  give us some of our wants that are in HIS WILL for us…

 

GOD is The Giver and Sustainer of Life

God holds ALL of us accountable for our behavior as well as how we give or do not give. Think about it for a moment? God really does see and know everything about all of us. How many times does the Bible mention the disciples indulging in sexual sins? Quite often the faults of the disciples are mentioned to make a point of their flaws. It was Judas who was close to the Lord, who sold Him out for money? Go figure? People often relate to others  because they have the same experiences.  But in actuality we are to depend on the Holy Spirit to help us exercise self-control  in all areas of our life, not upon ourselves. Truly God is more than able. All His promises are true!

 

You should want to become perfect in the Lord.   When you really believe God is omniscient you will live differently. Because you realize;  HE KNOWS EVERYTHING.  The perfection that the Bible talks about is not flawlessness. It is about learning how to be complete in the Lord. We are to daily strive for perfection. There is always room for improvement in all of us.   We are to regularly take Spiritual Baths in HIS WORD! We should be forever growing in His grace, knowledge and wisdom as long as He has us on this side of Heaven. The LORD is able to deliver us from ALL evil! We CAN be “Strong in the LORD!” Or HE would not have told us to do so.

 

 

Good boundaries should be exercised when you know someone is weak in certain areas. This applies even more so when you know you are in a carnal environment. You should be able to greet with a hug and express godly love and not want to sleep with or have any sexual interest with them. I say this because I have known that there are a few who use this as an opportunity to meet possible conquests. I personally do not usually indulge in what I call the many “Simon Says” activities that are now prominent during worship. Turn to your neighbor, say this, turn around, jump up and down, clap your hands etc. Observe, how many respond just like robots without thinking. This is actually “Group Think” behavior. Also notice that this is a trend that has also been recently  adopted in these latter years. It is optional.  This can at times hinder the flow of the Spirit.  There are few moments of peaceful meditation. There needs to be a balance. GOD always know when we are real! We are not to just do everything that man says do… How did we get here? It is always important to remain prayerful during worship.

 

We are living in the “Lasts Days” and some of everything is going on everywhere. Not everyone regards worship or “The House of The Lord” as sacred. 

 

Many Christians have been side tracked by indulging in ongoing sexual sin. Think about it, when this is the case this is actually practicing sin. Regardless of who they are this is not good.  They do not realize just how much this impacts their Spiritual Gift(s). Or maybe they are just ignorant to GOD’S OMNIPRESENCE and believe He doesn’t really know what is happening? Never undermine who GOD IS! Its important to keep in mind during worship that not everyone is spiritual. Encouraging repentance is always good. “Prayer ye one for another!”  Few really understand what it means to; “BE STILL & KNOW” I believe that there is much spiritual tension in the Body of Christ  that can easily be alleviated.

 

The Spirit of God is quenched when you operate in a carnal mode.

 

 

Many operate by using a seducing spirit which is NOT of GOD!  Many simply respond to the beat of the music. Remember this is a Spiritual battle. Pray for discernment! & Keep your Spiritual Armor on!   Many honestly don’t realize how they water down the effectiveness of their testimony. They also hinder their spiritual gifts when they are indulging in sexual misconduct.

 

 

Sex is not something to play with.

This is not about being negative, I am better than you, nor being Miss Such a Much. This is about being real! We are living in some interesting times with some of everything going on everywhere.  Many come to worship empty and leave the same way. For many nothing is sacred.

 

 

There is a better way to begin to lessen the growing number of Christians as well as non Christians to have better control in the area of sex. Less STDS makes the world safer for all of us…  This is a major problem throughout the world. You will never  have to worry about these type of things when you honor God in your marriage, life and home. We must work on encouraging others to build healthier relationships inside and outside of marriage.  At the same time know that marriage is not all about sex… Just know that God only sanctions sex between a husband and a wife.   We must respect our marriages as well as the marriages of others. When we do so we honor GOD!

 

I have seen that people are a lot more interested in talking about people who have a problem with material possessions. Usually the one who really has the problem is fixated on what someone else has. How big their house is or what kind of vehicle they drive? Or how often they travel here or there?

 

It was not Solomon’s material possessions that got him in trouble. It was His sex life! How he ever managed 300 wives and 700 concubines is news to me. Well you see in actuality he didn’t do this  to well; it is what really eventually nearly destroyed him. We can learn much from his plethora of Wisdom he candidly shares.

 

I always say: “I DO NOT have to go to the bottom of the Creek to know that there is mud way down in the bottom of it.”

 

In Ecclesiastes 12:13 & 14 Solomon says “Let us hear the conclusion of the whole matter; Fear God, and keep His commandments, for this is the whole duty of man.” For God shall bring every work into judgment, with every secret thing, whether it be good, or whether it be evil.”

 

Sex is not something to play with, don’t be deceived by thinking otherwise. The employment of improper sex in your life will ultimately lead to some type of dysfunction or some other problem. Take a Spiritual Bath in HIS WORD repent and exercise self control. You will be more confident in who you are in the Lord when you are striving to live to please Him. 

 

Let the LORD minster to your Spirit! Spend some alone  quality time with the LORD in HIS WORD! 

The 1st chapter of Romans candidly teaches us that GOD is opposed to same sex relationships. It goes against His natural boundaries; “…They exchanged the TRUTH of GOD for a lie, and worshiped and served created things rather than the Creator, who is forever praised. Amen! Because of this, God gave them over to shameful lusts. Even their women exchanged natural relations for unnatural ones. In the same way the men also abandoned natural relations with women and were inflamed with lust for one another. Men committed indecent acts with other men, and received in them the due penalty for their perversion…” Acts 1 You cannot change the TRUTH of GOD’S WORD! If you disagree take it up with GOD!

Think long and hard before you have or continue to have sex outside of marriage!

SEXUAL Problems For the Christians Part 4

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SEXUAL Problems For Christians Part 5


Part 5

You Can Build A Loving Satisfying Marriage

Sex is a taboo discussion for many. Old wife fables have hindered more than a few marriages.

Abuse, mistreatment, low self esteem and cruel continuing self punishment rather than discipline have left many scarred. Addicted and coeds with self defeating shame you have been left with a cloud hanging over you. This is NOT God’s destiny for you. God does not want you to have an unhappy marriage. Nor does He want you to have ongoing difficult relationships. Remember; GOD WILL; “supply all your needs according to HIS riches in CHRIST JESUS!” As simple as it sounds, You must start believing HIS WORD. For HIS WORD is “quick & powerful!” Which means it is ALIVE!

 

Now for some interim therapy; Get yourself a pillow, turn on some good Gospel Music and have yourself a good cry. Empty out some of that pain that continues to weigh you down. God knows exactly where you are. You are not alone in this. Allow the Lord to shower you with His Holy Spirit. Accept HIS marvelous Grace and allow HIS mercy to over shadow you. Start anew allowing His Holy Spirit within your inner being.

 

 

Don’t have an ongoing pity party that keeps you fixated on what has been. Use the pain, suffering and hurt to rebuild and or strengthen your character. Let this motivate you to change.  Recovery implies you are seeking to regain or replace what has been lost. Embrace godly principles to better guard your heart and accept the cleansing power of His Holy Spirit to make you His “New Creation.” God’s Word is so important. It is  not to just read but to actually bring forth healing & restoration.

 

GOD IS GOOD!!! GOD IS THE ULTIMATE HEALER!!!

 

Thank God for HIS HOLY SPIRIT HIS COMFORTER! Yes, there is hope for you and your marriage or future marriage. In the Lord you can find comfort. Make it your goal to seek and discover how to Love God and yourself more.

 

What God meant to be such a beautiful loving, emotional, physical expressive bonding experience between a husband and wife has become so terribly misunderstood.  Having intercourse is not a time to simply use your spouse.  It is a time to come together as one in a mutual safe satisfying way. Yes, this can be done in a honorable  way.  God does not sanction any and everything. You can be creative  have fun and remain respectful. Don’t think for a moment that He is not aware of what is happening everywhere…

 

 

There is a viable remedy. Each couple is different and needs to be sensitive to one another.  Sex is just part of a building a good healthy marriage. It is and enhancement that binds you together.  But it is not what keeps you together…   As husband and wife you must or should  work together harmoniously in all aspects of life.  You can build a healthy loving satisfying, caring understanding  marriage together.  You know why? Because God says so. Things are not always as they appear. Nor is this  a time for eye witnesses. 

 

 

The marriage bed in the eyes of God is undefiled.   How few or frequently is the time you come together  is up to you.  There are also times when you will want to abstain  for spiritual purposes.  Our bodies are unique.  You can remain a virtuous woman at all times… So always keep this in mind. Your marriage intimate love making is uniquely designed for you and by you as you come together as one.  At times it is simply a time of expressing “Oneness” or merely closeness.  Study the human anatomy as well if necessary.  Working together to achieve mutual satisfaction without shame is a healthy aspect of a good marriage. It is important to communicate with one another.  There is often unspoken communication, good healthy communication  is not always verbal.  Be in tune  to one another. 

 

 

For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and they will become one flesh. The man and his wife were both naked, and they felt not shame.” Genesis 2  God created the first  woman for Adam.  Adam was all alone.  He caused Adam to go into a deep sleep.  The  woman was then made from his rib bone to be at his side. She was created to be His Helpmeet.   Woman came from man.  God brought her to Adam and they both were naked and not ashamed. They were both created as one in Adam. It was not until after they sinned was the woman  even named.   Notice that it was Adam who actually later named her Eve.  Marriage is God’s first institution! 

 

Do not intrude on the privacy of someone’s marriage. Marriage in the eyes of GOD is sacred!

 

It is often erroneously thought that people who talk about sex have some underlying problem.   Or sex is dirty.  This should not be. You can talk about sex respectfully like any other subject.  It is important to talk to your children as well about sex yet in an  age appropriate manner.  They should know these days that some places are strictly for elimination of  digested food.   They should know that they can talk to you as their parents about anything…  Your children should always feel safe in your presence even when you correct them. By the way child abuse of any kind is a definite NO NO! Any form of Human Trafficking is an abomination to the LORD!  It is not the talking about sex that is the problem.  You should make them well aware about what God has to say about a husband  and wife coming together…  Many have been given erroneous information that has hindered them more than it has helped…  It is when people misuse or abuse sex  outside the confines of marriage that actually brings much confusion.  

 

Perils of Adultery

Adultery has serious consequences. It was serious enough that Jesus told the Pharisees that they committed adultery by their very own thoughts!   Many at one time were killed by stoning  for adultery. The Holy Spirit is the Comforter who leads us to all TRUTH! God is not a God of darkness.  Absolutely everything is transparent to Him! There is nothing new under the sun. Please take some time to ponder,  read and meditate on  this passage  of scripture and allow God’s Light to illuminate your mind;

 

My son. Keep your father’s commands and do not forsake your mother’s teaching. Bind them upon your heart forever; fasten them around your neck. When you walk, they will guide you; when you sleep they will watch over you; when you awake, they will speak to you. 

For these commands are a lamp, this teaching is a light, and the corrections of discipline are the way of life. Keeping you from the immoral woman. From the smooth tongue of the wayward wife. Do not lust in your heart after her beauty or let her captivate you with her eyes, for the prostitute reduces you to a loaf of bread, and the adulteress preys upon your very life.

Can a man scoop fire into his lap without his clothes being burned? Can a man walk on hot coals without his feet being scorched? So is he who sleeps with another man’s wife’ no one who touches her will go unpunished. Men do not despise a thief if he steals to satisfy his hunger when he is starving. Yet if he is caught, he must pay sevenfold. Though it costs him all the wealth of his house.

But a man who commits adultery lacks judgment; whoever does so destroys himself. Blows and disgrace are his lit, and his shame will never be wiped away…” Proverbs 6 NIV.

 

It is important to keep in mind that we are all different. But the principles for life and living for us all given by GOD in HIS WORD are very beneficial to all of us. Your marriage will be whatever you make it! Your relationships will be whatever you make them. Be selective as to whom you allow to speak into your life… Readily reject anything that is not of God!  God has given us in HIS WORD guidelines to help us in every area of our lives. It is your choice to know HIS WORD for yourself. Don’t allow anyone to pull you away from what you know to be right.

 

The world says do whatever feels good and follow the majority.   Your are under GRACE! “Let not sin therefore reign in your mortal body, that ye should obey it in the lusts therefore.  Neither yield ye your members as instruments of unrighteousness unto sin, but yield yourselves unto GOD, as those that  are alive from the dead, and your members as instruments of righteousness unto GOD …” Romans 6

 

Jesus Christ did not die for us to be slaves to sin. He wants to be a part of every area of our lives. HE never ever sinned.  “All have sinned and fallen short of the glory of GOD…”  Romans 3.  CHRIST JESUS overcame sin in the flesh for us. He fulfilled the law which was a mere schoolmaster… This is why we ALL need HIM as SAVIOR & LORD! As you begin to embrace the TRUTH of GOD’S WORD you can discover a “Marvelous Freedom” that yields much discipline as well as  inner peace.  Freedom does not mean that you do as you please when and how you please. Nor does Godly Freedom mean that you become legalistic. You rather seek a balance in all that you do. Your desire to live to please the Lord  will continue to grow as you seek Him. This type of Freedom helps you to yield to the principles of HIS WORD and you become increasingly disciplined and able to exercise self-control! You are not so easily led astray… The Fruit of God’s Spirit continually develops, manifests and multiplies within your daily life and also within your marriage.

 

You daily seek  or should seek to be led daily by HIS HOLY SPIRIT HIS COMFORTER!

 

 

Jesus came for us to live differently. He wants us to be different from the world. The world at large will not get better. He does not want you to be anybody’s puppet or robot. He wants to help each of us/ you to  become the “Best You” led by His Holy Spirit. He will never lead us to do anything that goes against HIS WORD!  Know that many of the ways of this  world have entered amidst God’s Church.   BEWARE! “For THE WHEAT and the tares are growing together…”   

 

“GOD IS LOVE” There is nothing, no thing, nor place,  or anyone greater than GOD!  Know that we the people are GOD’S CHURCH! In HIM you can discover everything that you will ever need for Life, Love, Daily Living & ETERNAL LIFE!  In order for this to be so;  we must, “Seek ye first the Kingdom of GOD & HIS RIGHTEOUSNESS and everything else will be added unto you…” Matthew 6

 

Know who you belong to

We serve an Omniscient God. As a believer know that your body is the Temple of GOD! This is what HIS WORD teaches us: “Do you not know that your bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own” I Corinthians 6   Be conscious of how much food  you do or do not put into  your body as well.  Become more conscious of healthier ways to nourish your body.  Be conscious of how you take care of it and what you do to it or what you place in it and where as well. Take care of your Temple.   Exercise self control and moderation.  As you age do so gracefully. Time is precious…  This is one of many reasons why it is important to take time to daily draw closer to the LORD!  Self-control is a by product of The Fruit of His Spirit. I assure you that it is only in HIM that you can discover true “Security & Significance. ”  

 

 

It is important to spend time with the LORD in HIS WORD! This way you can better understand when something or someone says or does is from the LORD or not from the LORD!  Holy Matrimony is God’s only  design for Marriage!  Know God and His Word for yourself… For His Word is “A LAMP unto our feet and A LIGHT  unto our path…”  Pray for increased discernment. 

 

Sharing & Caring!

“Greater is HE that is in you than he that is in the world!” As you submit to the Lord He will or can HELP you in every area of your life. God is greater than any problem that you will ever encounter. God wants to build Christian Character within us daily. He wants us to daily walk in the Light of HIS WORD!  GOD has magnificent miraculous healing power! By His Grace we can be made whole! 

 

Faithfulness, Grace, Joy, Laughter, Love & Peace comes from the LORD!  We can always and forever trust God and His Word! “…But when the kindness and LOVE of GOD our SAVIOR appeared. HE SAVED us through the washing of rebirth and renewal by the HOLY SPIRIT, whom HE POURED OUT GENEROUSLY through JESUS CHRIST OUR SAVIOR, so that, having been JUSTIFIED BY  HIS GRACE, we might BECOME HEIRS having the HOPE of ETERNAL LIFE. This is a TRUSTWORTHY saying. And I want you to stress these things, so that those who trusted in GOD may be careful to DEVOTE THEMSELVES TO DOING GOOD. These things are EXCELLENT & PROFITABLE for EVERYONE…” Titus 3

 

TRUST GOD AND DAILY EMBRACE & APPLY HIS WORD TO YOUR LIFE.  ABOVE ALL OTHERS TRUST GOD, FOR HE CAN HEAL  EVERY PART OF YOUR LIFE!  BE BLESSED IN THE LORD!  LIVE EVERYDAY: “TO GOD BE THE GLORY!”

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Intimacy With God ~ The Desired Destination Part 2

Clouds 5

Paul was concerned because some of the “Church from Chloe’s household” had informed him that there were quarrels among them. Paul realized the need to address the conflict which hindered their spiritual growth. Listen closely to the rebuke. He adamantly expresses the need for a call for genuine repentance, as well as exhortation. Paul’s sincere intent was to bring them closer to the Lord.

The Church is supposed to cultivate a passion for daily living for the Lord! Not just attending worship services. The Church was meant to stand for righteousness and be the Spiritual Light of the world. God uses whomever He pleases to fulfill the mission of His Church. According to the Word; “God has chosen the foolish things of the world to put to shame the wise, and God has chosen the weak things of the world to put to shame the things that are mighty; and the base things of the world and the things which are despised God has chosen, and the things which are not, to bring to nothing the things that are, that no flesh should glory in His presence.” I Corinthians 1; 27-29

Walking with the Lord is not a role to be played but a life to be lived! This is why Paul says “He who glories, let him glory in the Lord.” God is so worthy of all our praise! It is really by and through the power of His Holy Spirit we can attain a deeper ever growing level of intimacy that will enhance your personal walk with Him.

Due to the mindset of many of the Corinthians it was difficult to break the many strongholds. Carnality and spiritual immaturity permeated their atmosphere. Today as well during a service, although emotions and energy may be high it can still be void of spiritual depth. At times the atmosphere is orchestrated to a degree to get the people to react rather than simply naturally respond. God really does know where each of us are in our personal walk with Him.

Paul had to withstand some very severe personal attacks from the Corinthian Church. Their ritualistic traditions often impeded the move of the Holy Spirt. Paul was troubled to the point he had to defend his beliefs. He had no need to manipulate the people. His desire was to appeal to their conscience. He wanted them to experience the genuine abiding peace of the Lord. Although troubled he remained encouraged and thankful for the Lord’s guidance. Despite the persecution he wanted to “…give the light of the knowledge of the Glory of God in the face of Jesus Christ” II Corinthians 4

Paul’s concerns have been recorded as a permanent record. In His second letter to the Church in Corinth he continues to relay his sincere concerns to the struggling congregation due to both internal and external problems. This is why Paul’s ongoing desire was for their spiritual growth. Spiritual warfare was all about him. As a rebuttal and deterrent Paul’s credibility was questioned. Yet, Paul did not allow this to sidetrack his assignment. We too must remain focused when spiritual warfare presents itself. God in His own time will bring everything to the light. The victory is truly in sincere praise!

Having intimacy in your relationship with the Lord is one of the most important intangible things that you could possibly possess. God knows our place within the body of His Church. This will help you to know that God is a God of all comforts. That nothing comes your way that He is not aware of. God can, and is truly the only one, “who comforts us in all of our troubles, so that we can comfort those who are in trouble, with the comfort we ourselves have been comforted by God….” II Corinthians 1:4.

Paul helps us to know that despite our efforts we can be greatly misunderstood. Sometimes we have to simply show a contrast. Sometimes we just have to simply remain still… Many look for an outer manifestation of the Spirit. Rather than focus on welcoming the indwelling deep inner presence of the Lord. Paul realizes that there is great need for discipline and self control. “Wherefore, we labour, that, whether present, or absent, we may be accepted of HIM. For we must ALL appear before the judgment seat of CHRIST; that everyone may receive the things done in his body, according to that he has done, GOOD or bad…” II Corinthians 4

Paul’s writing includes significant teaching on a plethora of issues relating to sin and righteousness. Paul addresses the congregation by stating that he was called by the will of God. This in it self caused much resistance. In I Corinthians he dealt with the diversity of sexual sins and what happens when God’s plan for marriage and family are disobeyed see 7:1-40. He addressed the fact how proper worship flows from us by sincerely acknowledging God’s place in our life see 3:16-23. The pure significance of partaking in the Lord’s Supper see 11:17-34. Paul continues in significant detail a discussion on the effectiveness of exercising spiritual gifts as to when and how they should be properly exercised or not? Harmony and order were desired whenever they assembled. Christ really does deserve to always be the “Mainstay” of all our worship!

God has bestowed upon us the blessing of His Holy Spirit to abide within and to assist us in living a life pleasing in His sight. You must ask for this infilling presence daily. I encourage you to take some time to get to really know the Lord intimately. His Word has cleansing power. Repent of any and all sin before it ferments. Commence to really delve deeply into the meat of His Word. We can be sure and confident that God’s Word is infallible. Exercise your faith and entrust your future to the Lord. I declare, no matter what comes your way God will see you through! Christ birth, life, death and resurrection has taken away the veil. Nothing stands between you and God but you and any unconfessed sin. The Word of God is able to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.

God is truly faithful! We can always and forever trust GOD and HIS WORD!

See Part 3

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Embracing the Fruit of the Spirit in your marriage “Gentleness” Part 8

Embracing the Fruit of the Spirit within your marriage “Gentleness”

Couple in Grass

Part 8

The Fruit of the Spirit is actually a natural spontaneous occurrence that happens in our lives as we grow spiritually. Our character and personality is wonderfully shaped as we embrace God’s principles. The Fruit of the Spirit is Love, Joy, Peace, Patience, Kindness, Goodness, Faithfulness, Gentleness, and Self-Control.

 

Gentleness is important. Let’s now focus on the benefits of embracing gentleness within our marriage. You can develop a mutually beneficial symbiotically satisfying marital relationship where each partner is respected and appreciated!

 

Marriage is meant to be an endearing, beautiful, romantic, fulfilling, life long spiritual union coming together as one, between a man and a woman. Your marriage should be equally cherished by both of you. If this is not the case; time to get busy. You have some work to do. Dust off your vows, revisit, renew and now actually implement them within your marriage. Together working as a team you can accomplish great things together!

 

Your marriage should be or should become a priority if this is not the case. Did you know that you and your spouse are actually co partners in a covenant agreement? You have made promises to one another that go much deeper than a piece of paper! Your marriage will be what you make it… Learning to be sensitive, caring and gentle will help you build a cohesive, enjoyable healthy interconnected marriage. The well being of one another is a priority in this type of marriage. Embracing gentleness allows you to let your guard down with one another! Your weaknesses come to the forefront and you become transparent and open with one another and your trust deepens.

 

Marriage is meant to be an ongoing exciting life long quest together improving, growing, and becoming the best person you can be. You remain two separate individuals who are dedicated to growing together and working as an unbreakable team working side by side. You chastise and challenge one another. You also complement one another as well as build one another up!

 

Gentleness is important because it allows you not to hide behind the hard shield your personality must sometimes develops in order to protect yourself from the world and its influences. You must learn how to guard your heart. But within a good trusting marriage there is no need. For as your love deepens your heart remains open. You can instead allow your spouse to embrace you in a most tangible intimate way that is usually exclusively reserved for marriage. I must say you can enjoy one another even when you are not feeling well… You can not even utter a word and one another knows how the other is feeling. Spiritual “ONENESS” in marriage helps you to always keep a level of respect for one another. You build healthy boundaries around your marriage. You both commit to do what is best for the marriage. This is why you should not just join yourself to anyone!

 

 

When you invite the Lord into your marriage together you are able to weather the multiplicity of storms that life brings your way. When you disagree you stand firm but you don’t allow bitterness and strife to permanently nest itself between you. When one is down the other spouse brings comfort and maintains a healthy nurturing environment. Give both  gentle and firm embraces. Learn to  hug one another with  kind thoughtful words.  Gentleness makes you come close in your romantic moments as well  not just physically but emotionally.  You learn to  allow room for your love  to manifest in many ways…  It takes inner strength and security for Gentleness to be appropriately and sincerely expressed. In this case You both are truly equally yoked!

 

When you do not allow gentleness to become a part of your marriage your hearts instead harden. When you disagree you often become divided and resentment and unforgiveness instead sets in. This is why so many marriages end in divorce. One may often remain faithful as the other ones drifts… Rather than work through their difficulties and storms they begin to pull you further apart.

Marriage should not be full of drudgery hard harsh words continuous meaningless encounters and a lot of unhappiness. Life is too short. When you build your marriage upon trust and embrace the Fruit of the Spirit your marriage will flourish and endure! Time is precious and it passes by every so quickly.

Marriage is the oldest traditional institution known to mankind designed by God. It is the foundational relationship upon which the family was built upon. As you practice gentleness in marriage it becomes a part of who you are! You are better able to balance out the harshness that life so often presents. You have an abiding peace and comfort level between you. The core of who you are is openly shared with your spouse and you both are totally exposed to the Lord! You know that He really is Omnipresent. You both have committed to submitting to the Lord’s will and way in your lives by honoring your marriage vows. When a couple yields to the Lord His fruit will begin to multiply and manifests within their marriage. Gentleness allows your hearts to genuinely cleave together! What God has truly joined together man cannot pull apart…

Keep in mind; “GOD IS NOT THE AUTHOR of confusion” I Corinthians 14 It is never too late to give God His place within your marriage. Remember; After all you made a vow.

The last and next very important part of the Fruit of the Spirit is Self Control. Embracing self control will help you in every area of your life!

“But the Fruit of the Spirit is Love, Joy, Peace, Patience, Kindness, Goodness, Faithfulness, Gentleness and …” Galatians 5.

Part 9

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Embracing the Fruit of the Spirit within your marriage “Goodness” Part 6

Embracing the Fruit of the Spirit within your marriage “Goodness”

 

 

Couple in Grass

 

Did you know that marriage is a sacred, intimate, holy relationship sanctioned by God between a man and a woman? After God created everything and saw that it was good; God saw that the man He had made did not have a helpmeet. The animals, the beasts of the field, the livestock, as well as the birds of the air all had someone to be with… See Genesis 1 for more information.

 

The first Man & Woman as Husband & Wife

Adam was alone as a man without someone to help him and spend time with on a human level that he could relate to personally.  Actually Adam at this time was still in a perfect, flawless sinless state of being.  Yet, he too needed someone to be by his side. God had compassion upon Adam. This is what He did; “So God caused Adam to fall in a deep sleep; and while he was sleeping, He took one of the man’s ribs and closed up the place with flesh. Then the Lord God made a woman from the rib He had taken out of the man, and brought her to the man.” Genesis 1. It is here that we get a comprehensible picture of God’s original design for marriage. Out of His goodness and everlasting love! 

 

Adam and Eve were naked and they were not ashamed. At this time they were perfect for one another.  This is of course  was before they sinned and decided to instead disobey  God and do their own thing. God gives us all free choice! Adam & Eve is the model template for marriage His way.  He is the original Designer and knows what is best for the man and woman He created. God created marriage as a gift to Adam & Eve.  Marriage is serious business. Your marriage will be whatever you together decide to make it!

 

Coming together as One

The goal of marriage is to experience the ultimate oneness that is possible between a man and a woman!  Marriage is a Covenant relationship. This is not to be taken lightly. Man and woman’s physical structures are anatomically and emotionally designed to fit together as one. Within the context of marriage they are to learn how to meet one another’s need for  mutual physical sexual intercourse within the boundaries of marriage. Reproduction and pleasure are possible which usually involves penetration as their sexual organs are joined together.

 

Although sex happens quite often outside of marriage it is not sanctioned by God! Or choosing to live together as though husband & wife;  is still not sanctioned by God.  This is why many call this; “Shacking!” However, it is your choice.  Know; you are  actually choosing to live outside of His Will…

 

Adam and Eve were joined together and they were not ashamed. They had no limitations on their ability to flourish and grow until they decided to do their own thing. The good thing about marriage; this is where the man and woman can together build physical and emotional intimacy within a lifetime committed relationship. Although today, many marriages in excess of 55% now result in divorce this is not what God intended. “Haven’t you read in the beginning the Creator made them male and female and said; ‘For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united with his wife, and the two shall become one flesh? So they are no longer two, but one. Therefore what God has joined together, let not man separate.” Matthew 19. Marriage between a man and woman in the eyes of God is good!

 

Bone of my bone and flesh of my flesh

Take some time and look deeper into the WORD! When the LORD made the Man HE also made the Woman. He actually later took the rib bone  out of the Man He created and formed the Woman. This is why she is called “Bone of his bone and flesh of his flesh…”  It is healthy to desire to want to be close to your spouse. This is why it should be a natural desire to be together as one. Not only physically, but spiritually, emotionally and mentally as well.

 

This is why we anatomically fit together as one because we were made as one from the  very beginning. When  you come together you  can experience natural physical oneness.  After all  you  both have committed to one another and to God?    Or did you?  This bonds you together in a circle.  This is why you  always want to keep God and His principles within the circle. 

 

This is why you want to know and understand  that there is something  deeper happening  here than just a pleasurable moment.  You are  in fact giving yourself to one another. Be very careful who you allow to become a part of you.  As a woman know that you are allowing the man to make a deposit within you.    WOW!  This is why marriage should not be taken lightly. 

 

There is power in unity when you allow the LORD HIS PLACE within your marriage, heart and home.

 

This is also why there is so much spiritual warfare to try and undermine GOD’S DESIGN for Man & Woman. There is power in unity.  Marriage is the 1st and only relationship design for “HOLY MATRIMONY” that is honored by GOD!   It is important to always  holdfast to your marital commitment.   The world says do as you please when you please and with whomever you please. God gives us the freedom of choice.  He did not make us robots.  We however, must take responsibility for the choices we make. Choices come with consequences.  The choices that go against what God has said eventually yields division. 

 

Everything that GOD made was GOOD.  The spiritual warfare is designed to pervert and undermine  everything GOOD that comes from the LORD!

 

 

THE LORD IS AWESOME; “HE IS ABSOLUTELY AWEWONDERUL!

 

This is why it is so important to read & know GOD’S timeless WORD! As you read HIS LIVING WORD ask HIS HOLY SPIRIT to open up your understanding and reveal to you the  TRUTH! HIS WORD is necessary essential  SPIRITUAL FOOD for our souls!

 

Today in this 21st century many marriages are falling short of God’s design, but this has not changed His original intentions. God designed marriage to be indissoluble! The pressures of society continue to press upon many to once again; “do their own thing!” Please think long and hard before you commit or break your vow of  commitment to your marriage.

 

There is much spiritual warfare to split apart marriages, to sow discord among spouses and families and disrupt God’s design for life and living. Sad but true, some come into your life to disrupt harmony and bring division within your family.  This is often  the case when they have not resolved their own issues. There are spiritual consequences that are not always apparent… So please be sure when you decide to say “I DO!” If not; it is a good thing to remain single. If you are not sure or have serious doubts!   Wait!!! However it is your choice to have whatever type of relationship(s) you desire… Yet, always remember there are consequences  for those choices.

 

It is important to spend time with God to better understand His plan for your life.

 

Love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, are all wonderful aspects of the Fruit of God’s Spirit! Loyalty, commitment, dedication, monogamy, trust  and integrity are some of the many components of a good marriage as well. We can experience unity and empowerment within our marriages as we rely on God’s principles for marriage. Marriage is honorable in the eyes of God. When you honor your vows you honor God!  “Where two or three are gathered together in His Name, He is in the midst…”   Matthew 18 Relying upon our own wisdom and the ways of the world often increases the risk of relinquishing the plan that God has for your lives.

 

God is faithful! Faithfulness is the next part of the Fruit of God’s Spirit that we will discuss…

See Part 7

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Embracing the Fruit of the Spirit within your marriage “Kindness” Part 5

Embracing the Fruit of the Spirit within your marriage “Kindness”

Couple in Grass

Part 5

Kindness is a virtue. Mutual kindness needs to be embedded throughout your marriage. Marriage is the first institution between a man and a woman that was created by God. Marriage is designed to be a mutually loving, satisfying partnership experience.  As husband and wife you both have made sacred vows to honor one another as well as God! A part of honoring those vows means to be considerate of one another and sincerely extending kindness to one another. Kindness is a part of the Fruit of the Spirit! It is very important to continue to nurture your marriage when you truly desire to build a healthy lasting and rewarding marital relationship.

 

Strive to be kind to one another 

What is kindness really? Kindness defined according to the Encarta Dictionary is; “A compassionate act; an act that shows consideration and caring.” This is why kindness is so important within marriage.

 

All too often more consideration and thought are often placed into the planning of the wedding or ceremony than the actual marriage itself. If you have allowed your relationship to go stale and the two of you are drifting apart you can do something about it. This is true regardless at whatever your age is, as well as however long you two have been married. As long as there is breath in your body there is room for improvement.

 

The quality of your marriage can or should improve like a fine antique.  But you both must make it a priority to value and take care of your marriage. Tend it like  a nice garden. Think about it! What was your purpose for marrying anyway? Was it to make one another miserable? During your dating or courtship there must have been some tender moments that drew you together? Or did you do so out of sheer obligation? Or in some cases perhaps you had an arranged marriage and you are expecting love to follow… Whatever the case there is always room for improvement!

 

Kindness should be an integral part of your marriage. Being kind brings warmth and yields sparks of compassion and understanding. It holds selfishness at bay when you consider how your spouse is feeling. You care enough to speak the truth in love and want what is best for one another. Kindness brings trust and freedom! Knowing that your spouse is committed to you and the marriage yields security!

 

Life brings experience

Life is serious and we are living in some interesting times. Life is full of many mountaintop and valley experience. Even when things are not going well when you embrace kindness it allows you to be at peace with one another. Disagreements are normal. But they do not have to be resolved by resorting to name calling, hurling hurtful word for words and physical or mental abuse. “Death and life are in the power of the tongue, those who love it will eat its fruits!” Proverbs 18.

 

A good healthy argument is great and allows you both times to vent! But please don’t fuss and fight like children all the time. If or when one or both of you are angry, table the discussion for a reasonable period of time later on until you can discuss things rationally. Yes! Keep the child in you alive but do not allow it to take control. The child in you loves to have fun it also likes to have its way.

 

The growing adult in you must be willing to take responsibility whenever necessary. Kindness and consideration prevents dysfunction from nesting itself within the marriage. Dealing with the issues at hand and the desire to keep moving forward will help you build a strong secure fulfilling ever growing marriage!

 

Women & men were created  to be loved

Gentlemen it is important to know that a woman was made to be loved! Taking the time to listen and be sensitive, supportive and caring to her needs speaks volumes. Your genuine love will help her to become all that she can be. Ladies a man desires to be loved, respected and trusted! Listen twice as much (since in general we tend to talk more) attentively and don’t be so eager to talk before he is finished expressing himself. Be sensitive, supporting, and caring of his needs as well. This in turn helps him to become all that he can become. Good open healthy communication makes a great marriage!

So embrace your vows and always freely express love, joy, peace, patience and yes; kindness! Desire  and aspire to enjoy your journey together! After all marriage is really where; “the two become one flesh…”

Part 6

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