SEXUAL Problems for Christians Part 1

Part 1

The Bible Says A Lot About Sex

SEXual Problems For The Christian

In one of the Christian Counseling quarterly publications I receive, every single article discussed sexual problems. This really confirmed that the problems of this nature are definitely prevalent within the Christian Community. Many shy away from discussing issues that are of a sexual nature. It is quite evident that a plethora of the problems we are experiencing in this world today are rooted in improper sexual misconduct.

 

The Bible has a lot to say about sexual relationships. One of the main problems is that sex is more often than not practiced outside of the sanctity of marriage. God has said it is only within the marriage bed that sex is “undefiled.” Many have indulged in adultery, fornication and homosexuality and defiled the marriage bed.

 

Sex Outside of Marriage is Dangerous!

It is of no secret that time after time we see many men and women who fall prey to the pitfalls of sexual misconduct. Not fully realizing that sex outside of marriage is like “fire outside of the fireplace.” It’s dangerous! It will burn your house down!

 

You are setting yourself up for disappointment. You see sex outside the confines of marriage simply means; I am not fully committed to you. I need to be with you to see if we are physically compatible. I’ve been hurt before so I don’t really want to get too serious. Or my spouse and I don’t have a satisfying relationship so I’m really glad you are there for me. Or “I need you baby” if you love me you will do this for me?

 

This is only a few but there are so many more scenarios as well… Of course you have not uttered this in words. In the above cases your actions speak louder than words. Many simply do not really know what marriage is all about!

 

You want to take some time and think and ponder upon your marriage vows! There is always room for improvement. Hang them on your wall if you need to be reminded of what you promised to do! There are priceless precious spiritual benefits for keeping your marital vows. 

 

If you married someone who does not keep their vows.  They  have a problem…

 

God Can Cleanse You from all Unrighteousness

I have received many questions in regards to sexual problems. Many are trapped because they have nowhere to turn. Many women just don’t want to be alone so they offer themselves sexually, yet are physically unsatisfied. Many have been conditioned ignorantly to use sex as a tool to manipulate. Women who are used for sexual purposes are often thought of as mere objects. Many have been sexually abused causing them to feel low self worth. Often causing them to turn to drugs and  promiscuity or unwise counsel. This  further leads to a perilous journey of confusion, depression, anxiety and more issues…

 

This is not about putting anyone down. It is about sharing what GOD has to say about sex and relationships.  To motivate you to move towards GOD rather than away from HIM… Don’t settle when He has so much more instore for you.

 

 

Please know if you were sexually abused or if you are being abused now it is in NO way your fault! You can turn this around. Realize that you have been taken advantage of. This was an unrighteous act against you. Meaning; it was or is not right! Forgive yourself and don’t let this hold you captive any longer. God wants to release the pain your are carrying. God’s compassion  goes far beyond any life experience. Cry out to the Lord and say; “STOP it in the Name of JESUS!” Please hear me; GOD LOVES you and has so much more in store for you. Don’t let this be the theme of your life. Don’t let it rob you of a better future. There is cleansing POWER in the WORD of GOD! He can “cleanse you from ALL unrighteousness.”

 

 

Many have been taught that sex is no big deal! Everybody has sex and it does not matter if you are married or not. Especially if you are past a certain age or you have already been married. Or if you are not having sex something is wrong with you. You are not normal. But that is not the Christian perspective! You are giving parts of yourself away! This is why you feel less than… Your body is what protects your soul! You see God gives specific directions. The Bible says “for this cause shall a man leave His Father and Mother and cleave to His wife and they shall become one flesh.”

 

Let go and let GOD!

Sex outside the confines of marriage is dangerous emotionally. Why? It sets you up for possible problems that may not be apparent until much later?  You are compromising your values… You usually feel someone is looking down on you. This is regardless of how young or old you may be… You are also outside of the will of GOD!  Your decisions are between you and GOD. It is He that you want to consult if you are a believer.  It is wise to become more aware of HIS WORD. God always wants what is best for us.  He created us yet He allows us the freedom to choose. But it is important to know that will be consequences for your choices good or bad.  It is never to late to start making better choices. 

 

 

There is a deeper meaning to sex than the physical exchange. A bonding takes place. There is a magnetic chemical exchange. Within the confines of marriage a miraculous spiritual transaction is taking place! Your hearts can begin to become knitted together as one.  You grow in God’s grace and you want what is best for one anther as you commit to His Will. Did you know that scripture tells us “whatever you join yourself to becomes a part of you?”

 

Deep down you must know and feel that something is wrong, but you just can’t put your finger on it.  Sex outside of marriage  shows a lack of discipline.  In this 21st century just about anything goes. But not so in the eyes of God.   This keeps you from experiencing “the Kingdom of God is at hand.”

 

Some people just don’t practice good moral boundaries. They will sleep with anybody! Married or not married! Others have been erroneously taught that it really does not matter. Well; Its my body anyway! ” It’s just sex!” But is it really especially if you have confessed Jesus Christ? If it feels right we are not hurting anybody? From a Biblical standpoint just know you are outside the will of God! Anytime you choose to operate outside of God’s boundaries you can expect some trouble.

 

GOD SAYS; REPENT!

 

Take some time for an inner spiritual cleanse! Spend some time in the WORD of GOD! Ask the LORD to speak to your heart! It is time to really “Let go & let GOD”

SEXUAL Problems For Christians Part 2

Part 2

SEXUAL Problems For Christians Part 3

 
Part 3

Pray for Discernment

When I went to seminary I was somewhat disappointed to a small degree, but not surprised that the same problems existed. We live in a spiritual war zone. So always seek the “Will & Way of the Lord.” I have learned that sexual misconduct is practiced on many levels. It did not matter that my views were misconstrued as prudish because I know better!  This is not at all about exposing anyone; nor would I. It is about stating the facts to circumvent others from going down this path or at least help them consider making better choices.

 

It is important to keep in mind that spiritual warfare persists everywhere. Always remember; “For where two or three gather in my name, there am I with them.” Matthew 18.   It is always good to have someone who you are on one accord.  Praise  & Thank God! Always keep in mind that God is omnipresent so therefore everywhere you are He is also there.  Like it or not. If you are “Called” to ministry your first commitment should always be to please the Lord. To freely share the Word of God and encourage  any and everyone to abide by His Word regardless of their title, or  whoever they are. Christianity is a daily lifestyle. God holds each of us  accountable for what we know.

 

 

In Seminary there was an interesting counseling therapy class on “Gethsemane Patterning.” I was asked to sign a waiver in this class because there was some hands on activity that could possibly be a tad interesting.  I prayed about it. Since I could see under the right conditions it could be in some cases helpful in ministry when used appropriately. I grasped all the marvelous insight as well as impertinent methodology. It is also important to know your rights.  I decided to opt out of certain aspects of the class. Therefore there was no need for me to sign a waiver. We are called to be observant. Thank God for Discernment. That particular class ended up with a huge lawsuit against the administrator. I learned early  it is important to never throw caution to the wind.

 

Many hours of intense personal study, quiet meditation and practical application yielded a deeper invaluable reverence for our Lord.  We must always consult the Lord to lead us.  It also freed me to be more spiritually conscious.  God does not want us to be “Cookie Cutter Christians.” There is no need to compete in ministry. The Lord will help us do whatever He has called us to do.  His confirmation exceeds anyone else’s,. This is not about ego for I have learned to be confident in the Lord. God  does want us to be “in the world but not of the world” John 8.  I am most thankful for the experience as well as an invaluable wealth of spiritual insight gained. There remain many many more  precious memories I have than not so good..

 

The Lord always wants to lead us on the Path of Righteousness.

 

To know GOD”S WORD is good. But it takes His Holy Spirit to open your understanding so you know how to apply and or receive it.  It was good that the Pharisees knew the Word.  The problem was that they were not able to recognize and discern Christ Jesus.  Strive to study like the Bereans.  They diligently studied to know and grow in the grace of our Lord & Savior through His Word. 

 

There are many different denominational and nondenominational beliefs. Therefore, it is always good to be cautious, prayerful and seek direction from the Lord. Especially when you lay hands on someone who does not really know you. Or when you know you are amidst others who have a wrong perception of your intent. I understand why the Word says: “Do not be hasty in the laying on of hands, and do not share in the sins of others. Keep yourself pure.”  I Timothy 5.  No need to fear. Truly the Lord will protect you. He also sharpens your discernment. Spiritual things easily get misunderstood when in  the midst of carnal thinkers.  For; “Man looks on the outside. But GOD looks at the heart.” This is why we always need to consult with the Lord and be led by HIS Holy Spirit! There are times when you may just have to stay put and pray from right where you are. You can always pray and sometimes not necessarily out loud. The Lord knows if we are sincere and HE is always absolutely Omniscient…

 

God Is Truly Amazing!

There is a tendency to sometime overlook sexual problems within the Church. This is not good since this conflicts with; “…But the hour is coming, and now is, when the true worshipers shall worship the Father in Spirit and Truth, for the Father seeks such to worship Him” (John 4:23).” Here Jesus is talking to the woman at the well. This in itself was unusual for Him to be alone in her presence. Notice; He first talked to her about her life and all of her husbands. Then He graciously shifts the subject to telling her about “true worship!” Jesus was always totally aware and connected to the LORD.  He was never not GOD! He simply told her something that no one was aware of to get her attention.  She left His presence preaching delivered  and: “Come see a man…”

 

 

We cannot confine our infinite Lord to just a geographical area, people or building. HE IS OMNIPRESENT I have not found anywhere in the WORD where any of  His disciples  themselves had sexual misconduct problems.  Know how to keep your Temple, for it is where GOD resides.  Think about it. Most importantly this sends the wrong message. There is a difference between the “Fruit of the Spirit and the “works of the flesh” See Galatians 5

 

Know and discern when a “seducing spirit” is in operation.  Seek the Lord’s direction and pray  whenever you are in an emotionally charged environment. God does not manifest His presence  to bring confusion…  Know that God wants to impart peace and bring deliverance.  You can even bring peace to a dog if necessary when led by the Lord.  His Holy Spirit is the Ultimate Comforter!

 

We are not to sanction any sin in anyone.  This only helps to keep them in bondage. Sin  is what separates us from GOD. We are to exercise and encourage others to embrace self-control as well. He has given us HIS HOLY SPIRIT HIS COMFORTER to HELP us. GOD CALLS us and asks us to travel upon “The Straight & Narrow Road!” This is the road that is less traveled by many.  The reason why there are so many carnal problems with God’s Church is because to many allowances and excuses are made quite often for those who are connected to what they perceive to be their hierarchy.  They will often have a cult like mentality.  They also tend to be very territorial. Absolutely NO one is higher than GOD! His Word says; ” Of a TRUTH, I perceive, God is not a respecter of persons.” James 2

 

 

We are ALL SAVED by the GRACE of GOD! It is not by any works…

 

 

It is so very important to know the WORD of GOD for yourself. Many teach the traditions of their particular denominations over the Word of God! We in ourselves have no power. But we can access HIS POWER as we stay connected to HIM as the SOURCE of ULTIMATE POWER.  Our bodies are His Temple.  He resides within us.  God knows when we are committed to Him. God can use whoever is willing to submit to His Will & His Way.

 

In some cases just as long as you pay your dues or tithes you can be excused from just about anything. You are given their unconditional love and support?  Know  God’s true Love is priceless… The focus upon giving money is the greatest priority for many.   The desire to take care of  and maintain the building and its auxiliaries  are usually a main priority. Not that this is bad but keep in mind that God is aware of those needs as well.  Many are manipulated to give money for various needs. There are even tithing messages given before  the offering.  They  often will give a binary message.  They will tell you how much you should give and then knowingly attempt to put a guilt trip on you to give  the 10% you know you owe?   Is that because you are not giving to them?  Giving is good.   But know God does not need our money. He does not need anything from anyone.  Malachi is mainly talking to the priests who were quite  corrupt.  This is the main scripture that is usually  used. However it is taken out of context by many. It was written to correct many poor  religious and social behaviors. Most always attribute Malachi to “robbing God!” Malachi 3 There are many ways to rob God.

 

GOD LOVES A CHEERFUL GIVER! 

Allow the Lord to direct you when, to whom and how much to give. If you study you will find that tithes and offerings were not necessarily monetary. They were staples and food  that were stored in the storehouse so there were provisions for  the  priest to have food to eat.  The priest were not land owners. They usually solely worked for the Lord with very few possessions. Malachi 3 also states; “And they shall be mine, saith the Lord of hosts, in that day when I make up my jewels; and I will spare them, as a man spareth his own son that serveth him. Then shall ye return, and discern between the righteous and the wicked, between him that serveth God and him that serveth him not.”

 

GOD KNOWS WHEN WE TRULY SERVE HIM! 

 

Yes, The Lord wants us to give. “God loves a cheerful giver!” II Corinthians 9. The Corinthians were a very carnal Church. Here  in Corinthians you will see that the LORD gives a lot of instructions to His Church because of the mindset of the people. They got carried away in many areas. The main focus of worship should always be upon giving GLORY to the LORD. God wants to be a part of every area of our lives. He has promised “To supply ALL our needs according to His riches in Christ Jesus!” Philippians 4. God will also supply the needs of HIS CHURCH which is HIS people. He will supply the needs in every aspect of our lives.  ALL with the LORD means ALL.

 

Tithing was never meant to be a “Cover Charge” to worship & praise GOD!

 

“For the Love of money is the root of ALL evil” Where you find evil when you peel it all back you will always find this is to be true! It is not the money but the fact that some will do just about anything to get it.  Know that God is aware of this as well. God does not begrudge us to have things. But it is how we relate to them that matters most. We all so daily need His Holy Spirit to continually grow in His grace.  Everything belongs to the Lord. God will not only supply our needs but He will also  give us some of our wants that are in HIS WILL for us…

 

GOD is The Giver and Sustainer of Life

God holds ALL of us accountable for our behavior as well as how we give or do not give. Think about it for a moment? God really does see and know everything about all of us. How many times does the Bible mention the disciples indulging in sexual sins? Quite often the faults of the disciples are mentioned to make a point of their flaws. It was Judas who was close to the Lord, who sold Him out for money? Go figure? People often relate to others  because they have the same experiences.  But in actuality we are to depend on the Holy Spirit to help us exercise self-control  in all areas of our life, not upon ourselves. Truly God is more than able. All His promises are true!

 

You should want to become perfect in the Lord.   When you really believe God is omniscient you will live differently. Because you realize;  HE KNOWS EVERYTHING.  The perfection that the Bible talks about is not flawlessness. It is about learning how to be complete in the Lord. We are to daily strive for perfection. There is always room for improvement in all of us.   We are to regularly take Spiritual Baths in HIS WORD! We should be forever growing in His grace, knowledge and wisdom as long as He has us on this side of Heaven. The LORD is able to deliver us from ALL evil! We CAN be “Strong in the LORD!” Or HE would not have told us to do so.

 

 

Good boundaries should be exercised when you know someone is weak in certain areas. This applies even more so when you know you are in a carnal environment. You should be able to greet with a hug and express godly love and not want to sleep with or have any sexual interest with them. I say this because I have known that there are a few who use this as an opportunity to meet possible conquests. I personally do not usually indulge in what I call the many “Simon Says” activities that are now prominent during worship. Turn to your neighbor, say this, turn around, jump up and down, clap your hands etc. Observe, how many respond just like robots without thinking. This is actually “Group Think” behavior. Also notice that this is a trend that has also been recently  adopted in these latter years. It is optional.  This can at times hinder the flow of the Spirit.  There are few moments of peaceful meditation. There needs to be a balance. GOD always know when we are real! We are not to just do everything that man says do… How did we get here? It is always important to remain prayerful during worship.

 

We are living in the “Lasts Days” and some of everything is going on everywhere. Not everyone regards worship or “The House of The Lord” as sacred. 

 

Many Christians have been side tracked by indulging in ongoing sexual sin. Think about it, when this is the case this is actually practicing sin. Regardless of who they are this is not good.  They do not realize just how much this impacts their Spiritual Gift(s). Or maybe they are just ignorant to GOD’S OMNIPRESENCE and believe He doesn’t really know what is happening? Never undermine who GOD IS! Its important to keep in mind during worship that not everyone is spiritual. Encouraging repentance is always good. “Prayer ye one for another!”  Few really understand what it means to; “BE STILL & KNOW” I believe that there is much spiritual tension in the Body of Christ  that can easily be alleviated.

 

The Spirit of God is quenched when you operate in a carnal mode.

 

 

Many operate by using a seducing spirit which is NOT of GOD!  Many simply respond to the beat of the music. Remember this is a Spiritual battle. Pray for discernment! & Keep your Spiritual Armor on!   Many honestly don’t realize how they water down the effectiveness of their testimony. They also hinder their spiritual gifts when they are indulging in sexual misconduct.

 

 

Sex is not something to play with.

This is not about being negative, I am better than you, nor being Miss Such a Much. This is about being real! We are living in some interesting times with some of everything going on everywhere.  Many come to worship empty and leave the same way. For many nothing is sacred.

 

 

There is a better way to begin to lessen the growing number of Christians as well as non Christians to have better control in the area of sex. Less STDS makes the world safer for all of us…  This is a major problem throughout the world. You will never  have to worry about these type of things when you honor God in your marriage, life and home. We must work on encouraging others to build healthier relationships inside and outside of marriage.  At the same time know that marriage is not all about sex… Just know that God only sanctions sex between a husband and a wife.   We must respect our marriages as well as the marriages of others. When we do so we honor GOD!

 

I have seen that people are a lot more interested in talking about people who have a problem with material possessions. Usually the one who really has the problem is fixated on what someone else has. How big their house is or what kind of vehicle they drive? Or how often they travel here or there?

 

It was not Solomon’s material possessions that got him in trouble. It was His sex life! How he ever managed 300 wives and 700 concubines is news to me. Well you see in actuality he didn’t do this  to well; it is what really eventually nearly destroyed him. We can learn much from his plethora of Wisdom he candidly shares.

 

I always say: “I DO NOT have to go to the bottom of the Creek to know that there is mud way down in the bottom of it.”

 

In Ecclesiastes 12:13 & 14 Solomon says “Let us hear the conclusion of the whole matter; Fear God, and keep His commandments, for this is the whole duty of man.” For God shall bring every work into judgment, with every secret thing, whether it be good, or whether it be evil.”

 

Sex is not something to play with, don’t be deceived by thinking otherwise. The employment of improper sex in your life will ultimately lead to some type of dysfunction or some other problem. Take a Spiritual Bath in HIS WORD repent and exercise self control. You will be more confident in who you are in the Lord when you are striving to live to please Him. 

 

Let the LORD minster to your Spirit! Spend some alone  quality time with the LORD in HIS WORD! 

The 1st chapter of Romans candidly teaches us that GOD is opposed to same sex relationships. It goes against His natural boundaries; “…They exchanged the TRUTH of GOD for a lie, and worshiped and served created things rather than the Creator, who is forever praised. Amen! Because of this, God gave them over to shameful lusts. Even their women exchanged natural relations for unnatural ones. In the same way the men also abandoned natural relations with women and were inflamed with lust for one another. Men committed indecent acts with other men, and received in them the due penalty for their perversion…” Acts 1 You cannot change the TRUTH of GOD’S WORD! If you disagree take it up with GOD!

Think long and hard before you have or continue to have sex outside of marriage!

SEXUAL Problems For the Christians Part 4

Perilous Times and Perilous Men with a “reprobate mind.”.

June 26, 2015 was a historic day indeed. Today we believe the Supreme Court got it wrong in its decision to legalize same sex unions in all 50 states. Everyone has an opinion but God’s word is still true. “Whatsoever a man soweth, that shall he also reap” There are certain things God has cursed, and you can’t bless what God has cursed. Nor can you curse what God has blessed!

“God” is love! There is no way to really love someone without God. We (people) are the Temple of the living God, and God will not dwell in an unclean temple, so love cannot proceed from an unclean Temple as well.

 

It is so very  important to know the Word of God for yourself. It is through the washing of the Word we are cleansed from all unrighteousness.

 

 

 

The Word of God says;

“But know this, that in the last days perilous times will come: For men will be lovers of themselves, lovers of money, boasters, proud, blasphemers, disobedient to parents, unthankful, unholy, unloving, unforgiving, slanderers, without self-control, brutal, despisers of good, traitors, headstrong, haughty, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God, having a form of godliness but denying its power. And from such people turn away!

 

For of this sort are those who creep into households and make captives of gullible women loaded down with sins, led away by various lusts, always learning and never able to come to the knowledge of the truth. Now as Jannes and Jambres resisted Moses, so do these also resist the truth: men of corrupt minds, disapproved concerning the faith; but they will progress no further, for their folly will be manifest to all, as theirs also was.”

(2 Timothy 3)

“And even as they did not like to retain God in their knowledge, God gave them over to a reprobate mind, to do those things which are not convenient” (Romans 1:28)

“They profess that they know God; but in works they deny him, being abominable, and disobedient, and unto every good work reprobate.” (Titus 1:16)

 

This is not at all about hate . Butit speaks  volumes about what God who is Love  has said.  We believe God’s WORD.  A reprobate mind has finally reached the United States of America Supreme Court. And that’s our “opinion”.  Lord have Mercy & Lord Help us! 

Here’s another opinion about that decision:
http://www.cnn.com/2015/06/26/opinions/connelly-same-sex-marriage-ruling/index.html

The “DOWN-LOW ” Going on in the CHURCH! ~

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I must preface this by saying that the “Down-Low” is a rather controversial “taboo” subject. You may be offended by the contents before you. In general, this is preferably for adults only? It may ruffle your feathers a bit? However, I do think that having an open conversation with your mature teens should be a priority considered at your discretion… You might be quite surprised by their reactions? This helps to protect them from acquiring felonious information in regard to the “Down-Low” from an outside source as well as keeps the lines of communication open. They may know more than you think? If you are sensitive to the topic of sex; read no further!

The Bible has a lot to say about sex.  It talks about what is proper and it also talks about what is unacceptable as well as what is an abomination to GOD.   It is always my intention to encourage What God has to say from a Biblical spiritual perspective.

 

What is the “Down-Low”?

 

The “Down-Low” is a discreet sexual encounter between a so called straight married man as well as unmarried men who have sexual relationships with other men. They often have sex with their friends and other men without telling their spouse or partner! This happens within many races and cultures on every social economic level.  Often random one-night stands take place… Many who are professed Christians partake in this as well. This should not be. What is so very sad about this is absolutely nothing is hidden from GOD!  The fact that it is kept secret should tell you something. It is actually really another form of perverted homosexuality.

 

In this 21st century it becomes increasingly clear to me why God designed marriage in the way in which He did. One Man and one Woman for life is God’s design for marriage. Marriage is a sacred “Covenant Agreement” between one man, one woman and GOD!  He has not changed His design. His design for sex within marriage was to give us healthy sexual boundaries.  This keeps us free from STD’s, Herpes, HIV and AIDS!

 

The “Down-Low” is no doubt a homosexual act…  According to the Word of God homosexuality goes against one’s natural nature. God did not ever intend for a man’s anatomical exit to be an entrance point.  Intercourse in this manner is considered an indecent act. This is still in your Bible if you have not torn it out!

 

“Therefore, God gave them over in the sinful desires of their hearts to sexual impurity for the degrading of their bodies with one another. They exchange the TRUTH of God for a lie, and worshipped and served created things rather than the Creator- who is forever praised. AMEN! Because of this, God gave them over to shameful lusts. Even their women exchanged the natural relations for unnatural ones. In the same way the men also abandoned natural relations with women and were inflamed with lust for one another. Men committed indecent acts with other men, and received in themselves the due penalty for their perversion.” Romans 1.

 

If you beg to differ. Take it up with GOD!

 

I believe all of God’s Word. Do as you please but nowhere in the Word does God condone any form of homosexuality, adultery, fornication or any sex outside of marriage. They are all sexual sins.  Is Deliverance possible; Yes! God is able! He did tell  the woman caught in adultery;  “To go and sin no more!” That mean to not continue to practice sin.

 

I realize that these may be chosen lifestyles for many? You can choose as you please… But it does not make it right in the eyes of God regardless of who says so.  Sex outside of marriage  does not have God’s blessings! We; meaning believers are supposed to be “in the world but not of the world.” John 17. World; meaning cosmos the devil is the ruler of the cosmos. We are physically present in this world, but we are children of the kingdom of God. We are children of the LIGHT! We are supposed to daily walk in the Light.  We are sanctified by believing and implementing the Truth of God’s Word within our lives.  We are not to practice walking in darkness. GOD SAYS; “Thy kingdom come thy will be done on earth as it is in heaven…”

 

The enemy seeks to have you step outside of the Word of God! The Word of God always points us in God’s direction. It is a Light unto our path. It shines the Light on darkness and can point us back to the right path as well. We are to be “Narrow Road” travelers. This is why we all need Jesus as Savior and Lord to save us from the power and clutches of sin reigning within our lives!

 

I have counseled with some who have been ensnared into lifestyles of alternative sexual relationships. I have seen the aftermath of what it does to the soul, the person, spouse and family… In many cases it creates and ongoing cycle of distrust, rejection, selfishness and secretiveness that causes much ambivalence, despair, insecurity, resentment and anxiety for those involved.

 

Sexual misconduct should not be embraced, overlooked,  or excused especially so when you are called to  minister. To be a Minister means that you commit to preaching, teaching, proclaiming and living out the principles of God and encourage others to do so as well. We are supposed to present the TRUTH of GOD’S WORD regardless of what the world, the masses or anyone else says is okay.  Whenever you are experiencing extensive inner turmoil or conflict one must seek wise spiritual counsel and seek to resolve the issues that hinder you from confronting whatever the issue might be and reconciling yourself to the Lord.

 

The reason it is allowed to continue is no one wants to confront the offense. They seek to not address it but instead enable the participants. Leaving them on the “Broad Road” that leads to spiritual destruction. This is not loving them. It is sanctioning what GOD says; DON’T DO!

 

For an example a while back  Iyanla Vanzant on  one of her  “Fix my life” shows  presented an episode that depicts two different Ministers who have been involved in multiple secret homosexual affairs. They both preside over congregations. How can this be? The emotional turmoil and stress they are experiencing is candidly showcased. The consequences of this sinful  behavior choice has greatly impacted their  marital lives.  Both ministers have suffered as well  as their family life and the  congregations that they pastor.

 

Do you realize that this creates a cycle of sin?  Where many are being drawn in by a seducing ungodly spirit.   Some are aware but are paralyzed by a pseudo compassion.  This causes them to not want to have their spiritual eyes opened to see the harm that is being perpetuated.

 

The inner pain that both of these pastors are experiencing due to the shame and secret deception is quite evident.  Neither one cannot have inner peace apart from God. God is a compassionate caring and loving, but He does not condone or sanction any behavior that is contrary to His Word in anyone.  This is what His genuine Love is all about. Here lies the conflict. By what spirit are you ministering to God’s people or non-believers?  A seducing ungodly spirit of course. The call to ministry is not to adjust GOD’S WORD to make anyone feel comfortable in sin.  This is totally out of order!  God is clear;  Sin is what separates us from God.

 

When the man on the “Down-Low” is in ministry this can be devastating. This causes much conflict within the family as far as their belief system. For example; the woman may seek the comfort of another woman.  This goes against the Word of God.  You are also now out of the will of the Lord! This in turn leads to a confusing physical relationship that further complicates her life as well as further harm to the family.  This should not be.  A spiritual boundary is being crossed. This is the ultimate rejection so her self-esteem is at stake. She begins to question her own sexuality? To assuage her guilt she now also turns to drugs.

 

Denial big time is happening…

The various family members begin to act out rebelliously and justify turning to worldly living… In some cases, even becoming a lesbian, homosexual or bisexual…  This is not good or acceptable according to Biblical Standards.  Although it has become acceptable in the eyes of many in  the world… The children become confused as to what is right?  Now many children have been supported in questioning their gender? They begin to experiment and then can become promiscuous as they reach puberty… Which begins to perpetuate another vicious cycle of dysfunction?  What’s next? For now the world and its principles have  now entered and taken root within their home. The enemy has covertly shifted the entire focus of the family from God’s principles to his…  A stronghold has taken place.

 

It really boils down to spiritual warfare!!!

The Word of God is powerful and was given to help us navigate through this maze of life. We must proclaim the Truth of His Word and encourage others to draw closer to the Lord in these “Last Days. ” Rather than cosign behavior God does not sanction. Ministry is about encouraging others to learn to daily embrace God’s Way of living! Not making them comfortable in sin.  Making them feel comfortable enables them and leaves them without godly protection.

 

I know what it is like to be censored and oppressed for believing the Truth of God’s Word. But regardless of that I will STILL STAND upon the WORD OF GOD! We must stand on the Word of God. This is the requirement of the “CALL to Ministry!”

 

Many often compromise for fear of rejection or being thought of as judgmental. Or fear their congregation will fall off… However, by ignoring God’s Word they negate His principles.    Accountability to God is instead compromised for acceptance…  “In the last times there will be scoffers who will follow their own ungodly desires. These men will divide you who follow mere instincts and do not have the Spirit. But you, dear friends, build yourself up in the most Holy Faith and PRAY in the SPIRIT.” Jude 1.

 

 

CONTEND FR THE FAITH!!!

 

When you see someone, drowning do you try to help them to keep drowning? The point is we are called believers for a reason. The world and its ways of manipulation have worked itself into God’s Church. I am not talking about the building! I mean the lives of many baptized believers. The world says, “do whatever you feel is right.” But The Word of God says “REPENT!” Which means to turn to God; not to continue to repeat the behavior? We are not to jump into the quicksand of life! “Be merciful to those who doubt; snatch them out from the fire and save them; to others show mercy, mixed with fear – hating even the clothing stained by corrupted flesh.” Jude 1.

 

It is important not to compromise the Word of God even if it means being misunderstood.  You can or should deliver the Word in it’s proper context. It is much more important what God knows rather than what others think? Don’t give in to false doctrine that goes against what God says. We are supposed to influence the world not let it influence us! Spend time meditating on His Word; “Be still and know!”

 

It is so important that we personally know God’s Word for ourselves! We must develop and ongoing, growing intimate relationship with the Lord. This is about learning how to honor God with your bodies. In the Old Testament sacrifices were offered to God for the sins of the people. Now the world says do whatever feels right to you.”  Jesus became the ultimate sacrifice for the sins of the world. Now we are to offer our body as a sacrifice to the Lord. As we do this our lives are transformed, and our minds can be renewed daily by the Word of God. Do you believe God knows what is best for us?

 

“Therefore, I urge you brothers, in view of God’s mercy, to offer your bodies as living sacrifices, holy and pleasing to God –this is your spiritual act of worship. Do not conform any longer by the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is – His good, pleasing and perfect will.” Romans 12.

 

One must seek to rise above any behavior that is not pleasing to the Lord. This closeted homosexuality, adulterous, bisexuality is sinfully dangerous from God’s perspective The “Down-Low” is one of those patterns of the world, and it is inappropriate!

 

I realize that the Church is divided on the subject of sex. No one wants to talk about sex really, or address the growing issues? Do we continue to just bury our heads in the sand like an ostrich? absolutely NOT!  Many go to worship, sing, pray, dance, shout, fellowship and then go back to in many instances a lifestyle that is contrary to what God says is acceptable!  This is not to target simply homosexuals or lesbians. But to shed  LIGHT on the reality of what God was about sexual relationships…  It is important to know that you are living out of the will of GOD!  Worship really becomes a temporary distraction or just another social activity when  this  is ignored? Think for a moment; what if Jesus were to return today or  tomorrow? God is aware of the Truth… “True worshippers must  “Worship HIM in SPIRIT and in TRUTH.”

 

The idea of worship is to honor the Lord is it not? Are we not to learn to worship Him with our lives daily?  Or just simply make everyone feel comfortable and have an emotional charge  so they will come back.

 

To be entertained rather than “Worship God!”

 

Should we not be concerned?  Look around and see what has happened. things have gotten out of control…  Concerned does not mean you make someone feel comfortable in sin. For it is a slow day by day  death in process.  Bringing it to the forefront;  means that you care enough that you want to do something about it to help them… Many do not realize that they are looking for love in all the wrong places. The enemy just uses sex to win a stronghold over your life! He always perverts and distorts what God made for physical expression within the confines of marriage!

 

How to confront wisely

If you know that your spouse is indulging in a sexual relationship outside of marriage; I suggest stepping back. If you suspect this is so, be careful how you confront your spouse. Set aside some time when you both can talk. It is important that you get yourself tested? Prepare yourself. Keep in mind he may not be ready to confront his behavior. He may be offended if he is a leader in the Church… This makes it just that much more important! Talk about your relationship and how you feel. Allow him to talk about how he is feeling.  Time to get dangerously  untrapped from this behavior!  Ask him about his current sexual relationship with you before you approach his suspected infidelities if you are not sure?

 

When you find out this is so? Know you cannot change him; he has to want to change. Many women marry men thinking that they are going to change them? It won’t happen! Only God can do this! “HE IS ABLE!” You can and should always strive to  model godly behavior.  Embrace prayer daily. Seek and Consult with a godly couple that will reflect and reinforce the principles of God. You can intercede and “pray without ceasing” fervently all throughout your day!  Know that this is his problem and you are not the cause. He needs deliverance! It is important that he seeks help and you both get godly counsel as to how you go forward?

REPENT!!!

 

Marriage Still Means The Same Thing to God – No One Has The Right To Redefine Marriage

Our economy has been down and is now rising, gas prices were up and are now going down. The housing market was in a flux and many mortgage companies have folded. The automobile industry, stock market fluctuations, credit card companies as well as many other businesses both large and small have been greatly impacted. Life as we once knew it has changed so drastically over the last few decades. Marriages and family life have been further impacted; there has been a steady trickle down effect. There was a time when marriage was considered a respected solid rock heterosexual relationship between a man and a woman. It was the foundational basis in which onedesired to build a stable, nurturing, healthy family environment. In the eyes of GOD marriage still is and always will be a solid rock institution! However man has attempted to perniciously shatter it somewhat when the state of California decided to okay same sex marriages. THIS IS NOT GOOD!!! But, “Marriage still means the same to God.”

Since we live in a liberal society why not call a union between same sexes just that; alternative or open-end lease relationships or simply “same sex unions”. Why redefine marriage and make it inclusive for a relationship that is based on someone’s sexual preference? No one has the right to redefine marriage. See CNN Article )“Across America Human Rights Commissions have been threatening and attacking Christians and their beliefs.” according to Reality Alert news forum. As well, just recently in Alberta, Canada as well the Human Rights Commission (HRC) has sentenced a pastor…to silence due to comments he made regarding homosexuality. He cannot speak out against homosexuality–either verbally or in writing–for life. He must compensate the professor who filed the complaint $5,000, along with a written apology. This decision will radically further impact our society as we know it. What do you think is next? Marriage which is honored by God is now being reduced (in my opinion) to a civil right. Marriage is a God ordained relationship between one man and one woman, it now is being redefined to satisfy the desires of society. Webster’s Dictionary will have to redefine it’ “Bride & Groom” they will say “party A & party B.” But, “marriage still means the same to God.”

What does this do for future generations? What message does this send to our children? I think confusion! There is a difference. Depending on whatever your sexual preference is you can now marry who ever depending on what state you live in? Or better yet anyone who wants a “same sex union” can just come to California. Please take a moment to ponder this as well! “A homosexual man who has a blog on Sen. Barack Obama’s campaign website is suing two major Christian publishers for violating his constitutional rights and causing emotional pain, because the Bible versions they publish refer to homosexuality as a sin. Bradley LaShawn Fowler, 39, of Canton, Mich., is seeking $60 million from Zondervan and another $10 million from Thomas Nelson Publishing in lawsuits filed in U.S. District Court for the Eastern District of Michigan, the Grand Rapids Press reported. “

What is next? Changing another taboo from abnormal to normal? Perhaps lowering the legal age limit to marry and then the reinstatement of incestuous marriage relationships between close relatives? God forbid! What was unheard of a few decades ago is now the norm. God has established good healthy boundaries for a Christian marriage from the very beginning. It was the misuse of God’s liberal freedom way back when that mankind sought to do what was “right in their own eyes.” The Scriptures records in Genesis 19 the destruction of Sodom and Gomorrah, a society that was devastated because of their sexual sins. So here we are again. The Bible is so true when it says “nothing is new under the sun”. Same sex relationships are not new. They now just want to impede on the rights of God’s ordained institution of “HOLY MATRIMONY”. This actually puts our religious freedom at risk. Secular beliefs have now begun to merge and infringe on our Christian foundational principles. Think about it marital rights just because of your sexual preference. Does this mean we will have to selectively overlook certain passages of Scripture? Romans 1 tells us God tells us that “They exchanged the Truth for a lie.” Paul is clear in regards to what God regards as sexual impurity. God is clear on His position in regards to marriage! “Marriage still means the same to God.”

What is next? Now that everyone is coming out of the closet. I am not saying this to fuel any “gay or homo phobia” I am saying this because many Christians do not see spiritually what this is doing? There is a seducing spirit in operation here. God gives us the right to choose. As Christians you need to come out of the closet too; but, STAND for GOD & HIS WORD against anything that is not of HIM! You need to come out and openly declare what God has to say about this… Don’t passively listen or read through the Word of God! Since God did create us He knows what is best for us. When we embrace His Word it nourishes your inner spirit. Digest His Word and let it become your daily bread as He intended. Let it be that Living water that He provides that can only quench your spiritual thirst. When we choose Him we choose Jesus Christ as our personal Savior! “His Word is a lamp unto our feet and a Light unto our path.” Does this mean we simply overlook all the passages in regards to marriage? His Comforter comes to reside within us to help us to live to please God! There is absolutely nowhere in the Word of God where this is acceptable. Is not ALL God’s WORD true? Of course it is! God is Omniscient meaning all knowing! He knew then what would be now. II Timothy 3 tells us “ALL SCRIPTURE IS GOD BREATHED and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness, so that the man of God may be thoroughly equipped for every good work.” “Marriage still means the same to God.

We as Christians must firmly proclaim the Truth. We are becoming an increasing minority as far as upholding God’s design for marriage. I am pro God! God has already set the standards. God is Love. This is why He has establish healthy boundaries for us. We need to tell our children, friends and love ones that we love them. God meant love to be something wholesomely beautiful. Love encompasses a deep sincere concern. We should be concerned enough to say, this is what God has to say about marriage, life and living. God is Love. Don’t allow carnality to pervert God’s love. His love does not sanction nor ordain “same sex unions”, adultery, lesbians, homosexuals, fornication, jealousy, lying, pornography, sowing discord among the brethren, selfish ambition, drunkenness nor any other sins. Please don’t turn your ears away from the Truth! Know God’s Word for yourself! Meditate on His Word. LISTEN with your spiritual ears. I Corinthians says; LOVE is patient, LOVE is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. LOVE does not delight in evil but rejoices in the TRUTH. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. LOVE NEVER FAILS.” When you say that you love somebody, mean it. But first check it out by the one who is LOVE.The last time I checked God did not redefine LOVE; to mean whatever your sexual preference is……… God’s definition of LOVE remains the same regardless of what man does or says. Love is a gift from God. There is much inner peace when you know that the Lord knows your heart! I Peter 1 tells us; Through Him you believe in God, who raised Him from the dead and glorified Him, and so your faith and hope are in God. NOW that you have PURIFIED yourselves by OBEYING the TRUTH so that you have sincere LOVE for your brothers, LOVE one another deeply from the heart. For you have been born again, not of perishable seed but of imperishable, through the living and enduring WORD OF GOD………”

Within God’s Word you will find grace and peace in abundance as you embrace the knowledge of His Truth. His promises are precious. God has created us for a purpose and that purpose has not changed. We are living in times when marital infidelity is being rationalized and compromised. The world is ever changing. But as Christians we must look to His Word for direction. It is our “Life Manual”! God and God alone is Sovereign! God has revealed to us through His Word what He expects of us as His children. God has no grandchildren. Therefore as long as He has us here we are here to learn. He has created us with an innate ability to know what is right from wrong. The Bible also records the consequences of what happens when we do otherwise. Take some time in His Word. “Marriage still means the same to God!” If you have accepted Jesus Christ as your personal Savior you need to get to know Him intimately and personally. The world in which we live at large does not value what God has to say. So you need more than just second hand information. God knows where each of us is in regards to spiritual growth and development. The wonderful thing about God is “He is not a respecter of persons.” His Holy Spirit is readily available to all who sincerely ask. His Holy Spirit is our Comforter our Teacher and our Guide. God and God alone is Omnipresent. He is right here or there. This means He is everywhere you are.

Today it is becoming increasingly difficult to live in a world that does not respect what God has to say. But, “Marriage still means the same to God.” This is why we who say we are Christians must continuously consult the Lord’s Word. It is important to know that there is much spiritual warfare about us. God does not want us to live in fear. It is also good to know that the battle is not ours it’s the Lord. Ephesians 6 teaches us the significance of spiritual armor. Our position is to stand on His Word. Through Faith we can declare it fearlessly. It is important to know what His Word says when you take a stand. Marriage is important to Him. In the Old Testament Genesis He says, “She shall be called woman, for she was taken out of man. For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united with his wife, and they will become one flesh.” In the New Testament in Mark 10 He says, “But at the beginning of creation God made them male and female. For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh. So they are no longer two but one. Therefore what God has joined together, let not man separate.” God’s principles for marriage have not changed.Search the Scriptures for more information on Christian marriage. Marriage is not the same as “same sex unions”. Finally in Hebrews 13 it states “ Marriage should be honored by all, and the marriage bed kept pure, for God will judge the adulterer and all the sexually immoral………..” “Marriage still means the same to God.”

Homosexuality

Homosexuality

Today the world fervently proclaims homosexuality is an alternative lifestyle. Society disrespectfully disregards what God has to say in regards to the matter. We as Christians often take a neutral position fearfully dreading being persecuted for being unloving and judgmental. What is homosexuality? Webster defines homosexuality as relating to or exhibiting sexual desire towards one’s own sex… By the way there is no factual medical data to substantiate homosexuality as an inborn trait. It is a learned behavior. The scriptures tells us homosexuality is an abomination in the sight of God. I Kings 14: 24. ” Do not lie with a man as one lies with a woman that is detestable.” Leviticus 18: 22 (NIV).

Homosexuality is not something we as Christians should passively overlook. Especially when it obviously raises it’s head in the assembly of the Lord. It is the sin that literally destroyed Sodom and Gomorrah. We have an obligation to enlighten others in regards to the pitfalls of sin that God has clearly defined as forbidden territory. Roman states “Therefore God gave them over in the sinful desires of their hearts to sexual impurity for the degrading of their bodies with one another. They exchanged the truth of God for a lie, and worshipped and served created things rather than the Creator who is forever praise, Amen.. Because of this, God gave them over to shameful lusts. Even the women exchanged natural relations with women and were inflamed with lust for one another. Men committed indecent acts with other men, and received in themselves the due penalty for their perversion. Futhermore, since they did not think it worthwhile to retain the knowledge of God, He gave them over to a depraved mind to do what ought not to be done” Romans 1: 24-28 (NIV)). This is GOD speaking. This passage of Scripture is quite clear. To those who have an ear let him/her hear.

We should really be about our Father’s business daily. Instead we select to entangle ourselves in a web of bureaucracy. We have allowed immorality to permeate our worship services. Appointing known practicing homosexuals, bisexuals as well as adulterers to highly visible positions. All in the name of Jesus. Know that there is a seducing spirit in operation here. Creating a multiplicity of carnally based programs and positions patterned after the standards of the world. What kind of example does this set for the children? Many teenagers are finding themselves confused and not knowing who they are. Now to the point that some are confused about their gender? This should not be! They are having an identity crisis and beginning to venture further into homosexuality. Young girls and boys need positive Christian role models as well as some one to discuss their inner feelings! The world continues to blur the sexual lines and many are getting trapped! The Bible is clear on its position of “same sex relationships!”Christ is the head of the body, the church, He must have the preeminence in all things.

You don’t have to allow sin to reign in your life. A few moments of lustful pleasure could possibly result in eternal damnation. God does not always stop us from choices that are against His will. Just know whatever gifts He has bestowed you with are greatly hindered if you choose to indulge in sexual sin. The sexual sins carry a stronger penalty. Don’t be seduced by that seducing spirit. Be truthful with yourself. You won’t have inner peace unless you repent. If you know someone who is trapped in homosexuality immediately begin to intercede for them. If you have the faith God has the power. James says “My brother, if one of you should wander from the truth and someone should bring him back, remember this: whoever turns a sinner from the error of his way will save him from death and cover over a multitude of sins” James 5:19-20 (NIV.)

Jesus is coming back and although He is coming as a thief in the night He tells His children that we should not be surprised at His sudden return. We definitely know He’s coming we just don’t know when! “Finally brothers, we instructed you how to live in order to please GOD, as in fact now you are living. Now we ask you and urge you in the Lord Jesus to do this more and more. For you know what instructions we gave you by the authority of the Lord Jesus. It is GOD’S WILL that we should be sanctified: that you should avoid sexual immorality: that each of you should learn to control his own body in a way that is holy and honorable, not in passionate lust like the heathen, who do not know God; and that in this matter no one should wrong his brother or take advantage of him. The Lord will punish men for all such sins, as we have already told you and warned you. For GOD did not call us to be impure, but to live a holy life. Therefore, he who rejects this instruction does not reject man but GOD, who gives you His HOLY SPIRIT. I Thessalonians 4:1-8 (NIV)

Whenever anyone chooses to indulge in destructive or immoral behavior consistently that is in a position of leadership they should opt to “sit down” until they have gained self control over the impending behavior. In ministry our first desire should be to live to please the Lord. When under the influence or engaging in behavior that the LORD has deemed unacceptable it is difficult to help others break free of the shackles of sin. We must daily check ourselves to see if we are operating in the Faith. When we submit to the WILL & WAY of the LORD we are in a better position to help those we are called to minister to. As we empty ourselves we can ask the Holy Spirit to Fill us so we can go forth in JESUS NAME! God knows what is best for each of us have given us instructions for living in HIS WORD! Live everyday to the GLORY of GOD!

Today in the world where there is a multiplicity of “alternative lifestyles” know that GOD has NOT changed HIS design for marriage. Readily “REPENT!” of anything that is not like GOD in your life. Spend some time in His Word and draw closer to Him daily. He will and can lead you in the “Path of Righteousness” for HIS Namesake and get you back on the straight and narrow. Have FAITH in GOD!

God created Adam and Eve, not Adam and Steve. He wants us to have a companion helpmeet but not of the same sex. We must daily contend for the faith in these Latter Days! We must not walk in darkness and claim ourselves to be children of the Light. We must like the salmon swim against the current to get upstream! We must go against the grain when necessary We must take a stand for righteousness… Look back to learn from where you have been and what has happened. But press forward and consistently reach to the Lord to take you higher in HIM! Move up higher a little more each day. Christ is coming back for a church without spot or wrinkle. Don’t be left behind. Will you be there? Will you be caught up in the clouds to meet Him in the air?